Discworld & Terry Pratchett Wiki - User contributions [en]

A. Parker and Son's

2020-04-08T04:40:36Z

JesseW: add mention of actor who played him

A. Parker & Son's is a greengrocers shop ("High Clas's Fruit and Vegetable's")1 located at 1 [[Lobbin Clout]], [[Ankh-Morpork]] and operated by Mr Antimony Parker and his middle-aged son.

The shops biggest claim to fame is that it received the first letter from the newly re-formed [[Ankh-Morpork Post Office]], delivered by the [[Moist von Lipwig|Postmaster]] hims'elf. Admittedly the letter was written 41 years earlier by Agnathea to Antimony Parker accepting his' offer of marriage.

1 The Parker's not only use a great many apostrophe's (as befit's their trade), they have the unusual ability to ''pronounce'' them.

Antimony Parker was played by Matt Devere in the [[Going Postal]] miniseries.

[[Category:Ankh-Morpork Businesses|Parker & Son's A]]
[[Category:Discworld characters|Parker,Antimony]]

Parker

2020-04-08T04:38:36Z

JesseW: Redirected page to A. Parker and Son's

#REDIRECT [[A. Parker and Son's]]

Jolly Cabbage

2020-03-08T01:53:48Z

JesseW:

The Jolly Cabbage is the [[Pubs|pub]] in the town of [[Scrote]], which was in the time of {{SM}} inhospitable to [[The Band With Rocks In]], and even more inhospitable to a luckless visiting [[Trolls|troll]] whose memory lingers on in the garden rockery. While the pub has expanded and built an annex to take advantage of the railway trade, in the opinion of Mrs [[Georgina Bradshaw]] it hasn't changed or improved much.

[[Category: Locations]]

Book title acronyms

2020-03-08T01:52:53Z

JesseW: converted some over; will do rest later

Special templates to make links to books consistent (and easier.) The table below contains the books and their template code.

{|style="width: 52em; border: 1px solid black; border-collapse:collapse;"

|-style="text-align: left; border: 1px solid black; "
!Template !! Book

{{title row|COM}}
{{title row|TLF}}
{{title row|ER}}
{{title row|M}}
{{title row|S}}
{{title row|WS}}
{{title row|P}}
{{title row|G!G!}}
{{title row|E}}
{{title row|MP}}
{{title row|RM}}
{{title row|WA}}
{{title row|SG}}
{{title row|LL}}
{{title row|MAA}}
{{title row|SM}}
{{title row|IT}}
{{title row|M!!!}}
{{title row|FOC}}
{{title row|H}}
{{title row|J}}
{{title row|TLC}}
{{title row|CJ}}
{{title row|TFE}}
{{title row|TT}}
{{title row|TOT}}
{{title row|TLH}}
{{title row|TAM}}
{{title row|NW}}
{{title row|WFM}}
{{title row|MR}}
{{title row|HFOS}}
{{title row|GP}}
{{title row|T!}}
{{title row|W}}
{{title row|MM}}

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{UA}}</nowiki> || {{UA}}

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|<nowiki>{{ISWM}}</nowiki> || {{ISWM}}

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|<nowiki>{{SN}}</nowiki> || {{SN}}

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|<nowiki>{{RS}}</nowiki> || {{RS}}

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|<nowiki>{{DD}}</nowiki> || {{DD}}

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|<nowiki>{{TGL}}</nowiki> || {{TGL}}

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|<nowiki>{{NOC}}</nowiki> || {{NOC}}

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|<nowiki>{{SOD1}}</nowiki> || {{SOD1}}

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|<nowiki>{{SOD2}}</nowiki> || {{SOD2}}

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|<nowiki>{{SOD3}}</nowiki> || {{SOD3}}

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|<nowiki>{{SOD4}}</nowiki> || {{SOD4}}

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|<nowiki>{{DC}}</nowiki> || {{DC}}

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|<nowiki>{{NDC}}</nowiki> || {{NDC}}

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|<nowiki>{{TR}}</nowiki> || {{TR}}

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|<nowiki>{{TPP}}</nowiki> || {{TPP}}

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|<nowiki>{{AOD}}</nowiki> || {{AOD}}

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|<nowiki>{{GO}}</nowiki> || {{GO}}

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|<nowiki>{{TUC}}</nowiki> || {{TUC}}

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{T}}</nowiki> || {{T}}

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|<nowiki>{{D}}</nowiki> || {{D}}

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|<nowiki>{{WI}}</nowiki> || {{WI}}

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|<nowiki>{{OY}}</nowiki> || {{OY}}

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|<nowiki>{{JATD}}</nowiki> || {{JATD}}

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|<nowiki>{{JATB}}</nowiki> || {{JATB}}

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|<nowiki>{{N}}</nowiki> || {{N}}

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|<nowiki>{{ST}}</nowiki> || {{ST}}

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|<nowiki>{{TDSOTS}}</nowiki> || {{TDSOTS}}

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|<nowiki>{{DO}}</nowiki> || {{DO}}

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|<nowiki>{{UUD}}</nowiki> || {{UUD}} - ''Unseen University Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{CWD}}</nowiki> || {{CWD}} - ''City Watch Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{AGD}}</nowiki> || {{AGD}} - ''Assassins' Guild Diary''

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{FGD}}</nowiki> || {{FGD}} - ''Fools' Guild Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{TGD}}</nowiki> || {{TGD}} - ''Thieves' Guild Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{RVD}}</nowiki> || {{RVD}} - ''Reformed Vampires' Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{TCDA}}</nowiki> || {{TCDA}} - ''Discworld Almanak''

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|<nowiki>{{AMPOH}}</nowiki> || {{AMPOH}} - ''Post Office Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{MB}}</nowiki> || {{MB}}

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|<nowiki>{{LTYOE}}</nowiki> || {{LTYOE}} - ''Lu-Tze's Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{WRI}}</nowiki> || {{WRI}} - ''Igor Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{APMMW}}</nowiki> || {{APMMW}} - ''Witches Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{TPD}}</nowiki> || {{TPD}} - ''Terry Pratchett Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{TPQD}}</nowiki> || {{TPQD}} - ''Terry Pratchett Quiz Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{DAFJ}}</nowiki> || {{DAFJ}} - ''Death Journal''

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|<nowiki>{{AMAV1}}</nowiki> || {{AMAV1}} - ''Ankh-Morpork Archives Volume One''

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|<nowiki>{{CWJ}}</nowiki> || {{CWJ}} - ''City Watch Journal''

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{OMWF}}</nowiki> || {{OMWF}}

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|<nowiki>{{BS}}</nowiki> || {{BS}}

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|<nowiki>{{SK}}</nowiki> || {{SK}}

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|<nowiki>{{TB}}</nowiki> || {{TB}}

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|<nowiki>{{TOC}}</nowiki> || {{TOC}}

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|<nowiki>{{TWOP}}</nowiki> || {{TWOP}}

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|<nowiki>{{TLE}}</nowiki> || {{TLE}}

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{TLW}}</nowiki> || {{TLW}}

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{TLM}}</nowiki> || {{TLM}}

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{TLU}}</nowiki> || {{TLU}}

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{TLCO}}</nowiki> || {{TLCO}}
|}

[[Category:Title shortcut templates|Book title acronyms]]

Template:Title row

2020-03-08T01:49:00Z

JesseW: whoops

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{{1}}}}} || {{{{{1}}}}}<noinclude>

This avoids duplication on the list of [[Book title acronyms]].
</noinclude>

Template:Title row

2020-03-08T01:48:11Z

JesseW: Created page with "|-style="border: 1px solid black; " |<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{{1}}} || {{{{{1}}}}}<noinclude> This avoids duplication on the list of Book title acronyms. </noinclude>"

|-style="border: 1px solid black; "
|<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{{1}}} || {{{{{1}}}}}<noinclude>

This avoids duplication on the list of [[Book title acronyms]].
</noinclude>

Sto Kerrig

2020-03-08T01:46:05Z

JesseW:

'''Sto Kerrig''' was first mentioned in the novel {{M}}. Sto Kerrig is a small city-state on the [[Sto Plains]], recently a protectorate of the Monarchy of [[Sto Lat]]. However, it seems that the Monarchy attaches far more importance to a Long Thin Debated Piece just Hubwards of the city. One of its rulers was assassinated due to a contract placed by the then Duke of [[Sto Helit]], a cunning man with a plan to murder his way to the throne of Sto Lat and then unite the kingdoms into a powerful confederacy on the Sto Plains.

One of the [[clacks]] towers serving it was attacked by [[grag]]s early in {{RS|(p. 65)}}.

It receives a far longer description in {{MB}}. It is the terminus of the [[Sto Plains Line]] spur line from [[Huddle]]. The city is situated on the River [[Sour]] and is the centre of a thriving cabbage-based papermaking industry. It manufactures the cabbage-based adhesive used by the Post Office on its 50p "celebration of the Sto Plains cabbage industry" stamps. [[Remnant Hall]], home of the acclaimed portrait painter [[Josiah Remnant]] is here and is a local tourist attraction. The Great Battle of Sto Kerrig happened here in 1642. surrounding fields grow the fine white-leaved Bockingfield cabbage, which is converted into luxury paper by local artisans.

[[Category:Discworld geography]]
[[Category: locations]]
[[Category: Railway Lines]]
[[de:Sto Kerrig]]

Evadne Trellis

2020-03-08T01:45:29Z

JesseW:

'''Mrs Evadne Trellis''' of [[Effing Forest]] is a prolific and persistent letter-writer. A sample of her prose, defending the right of Great Tits to move unencumbered and to be seen in profusion in the healthy open air, is reproduced in {{MB}}.

==Annotation==
* Another prolific writer of letters that almost make sense is a Mrs Trellis of Prestatyn, Denbighshire, North Wales, who writes regularly to the makers of BBC radio comedy panel show ''I'm sorry, I Haven't A Clue''.

[[Category:Discworld characters|Trellis, Evadne]]
[[Category:Human characters|Trellis, Evadne]]

Bergholt Stuttley Johnson

2020-03-08T01:45:13Z

JesseW: use {MB}

{{Character Data
|title= "Bloody Stupid" Johnson
|photo=Blank.jpg|
|name= Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
|age=
|race= [[:Category:Human characters|Human]]
|occupation= Inventor
|appearance=
|residence= [[Ankh-Morpork]]
|death= unknown, probably 1960s UC
|parents=
|relatives=
|children=
|marital status=
|books=
|cameos= mentioned in many of the books, such as: {{MAA}}, {{IT}}, {{M!!!}}, {{H}}, {{CJ}}, {{GP}}, {{T!}}, {{UA}}, {{MB}}
}}
Real name '''Bergholt Stuttley Johnson'''. He probably didn't ask for his nickname, but it was so fitting that people of all classes and from all walks of life – [[wizard's magic|wizards]], [[Sto Plains|nobles]], [[Ankh-Morpork|ordinary city people]] – all through history called, and still call him, '''"Bloody Stupid" Johnson'''.

Johnson is an historical figure, which is a blessing because the damage would be considerable if he were still active. (There is evidence that he was alive during or just before the time of ''Light Fantastic'', given that he was commissioned by [[Galder Weatherwax|Archchancellor Weatherwax]]). Supposedly, Johnson claimed that a truly good inventor ought to be able to invent ''anything''. That, using a modern interpretation, may suggest that a truly infinite multiverse ought to contain all kinds of good things, bad things, and plain weird things. A more fair and analytical statement posited that Johnson's inventions might very well be ingenious, but would never turn out to do what they were supposed to do. If something he designed worked well, it was purely by accident. Somebody requiring a surface-to-air missile probably should ask Johnson to design a small fountain.

In addition to inventing machines of all sorts, Johnson also did architectural designs. Some of the things went ''wrong'' because of drawing the plan the wrong way around, being careless with unit measures (feet vs. inches) and numbers (1,000 vs. 0.001), and so on, but other strange effects must have taken considerable skills. The only thing(s) he developed that worked well, in the way that they were supposed to, without ever breaking down, were the organs (musical instruments), three of which are still in existence and in good working condition. Each of these great organs is a huge contraption with an amazing, possibly frightening, range of sound effects.

He became so notorious, that it became fashionable for rich people to have been "Johnsoned" (see ''[[Book:The Discworld Companion|The Discworld Companion]]''). [[Sybil Ramkin]] proudly states that her family's property escaped this fate, as her grandfather saw Johnson walking up the drive one day with a hopeful salesman's smile on his face; Grand-père Ramkin promptly shot him in the leg as a warning.

The date of his death is not available. He worked for Lord [[Snapcase]] but not after his term, so it was in the range of thirty years ago. His invention of the Sorting Engine at the Post Office is within living memory of [[Tolliver Groat]]. [[Sybil Ramkin]]'s grandfather shot him in the leg. This could have taken place far earlier while her grandparent was still young and vigorous enough to draw a bow, or it could have been when he was old but still keen-eyed enough to use a crossbow. Conflictingly, the {{AMPOH}} has a reference to his having done a memorably ''different'' job for the [[Post Office]] in the Common Year of 1815, over a century before the "present". This could be due to his having been very long lived; or else B.S. Johnson is a family name handed down, from father to son, in a dynasty of similarly inclined people; or it could be [[History Monks]] - again.

However, lost and forgotten examples of his prolific design come to the light of day all the time. As the railways expand and find new destinations, {{MB}} lists several Johnson designs which have found new purpose - completely unintended by their builder - around the Sto plains. These will be added to the lists below as they emerge.

All in all, his works include:

==Architecture large enough to be kept in a small cardboard box in a skinny old man's pocket==
*'''Colossus of Morpork.'''
*'''Commemorative arch for Battle of Crumhorn.'''
*'''Hanging Gardens of Ankh.'''

(The skinny old man in question is one Mr [[Scant]], Official Keeper of the Monuments, usually found asleep on a stool [presumably when he's not fallen off the stool] at a road junction somewhere near the [[Beggars' Guild]] most weekdays)

==Other notable building works==
*'''[[Quirm]] Memorial.'''
*'''Collapsed Tower of Quirm''', for which Johnson specified quicksand as a building material because they wanted it up fast.
*'''Ornamental cruet set''' for Lord Snapcase, Ankh-Morpork. The salt and pepper shakers are large enough to house four families and store grain. Another ornamental cruet set found its way, by accident, into the design of the [[Sto Lat]] maze.
*'''[[Empirical Crescent]]''', Ankh-Morpork. It looks like a normal set of houses, but the dimensions inside it are twisted, as well as of the gardens. Everybody throws out their junk, because it probably doesn't land in their own gardens. Someone might live at number 1, but his bedroom could be at number 3 and his kitchen in number 5. The painter [[Methodia Rascal]] lived in this street, which probably didn't do any good to his already unstable mental constitution.
*The '''[[Great Maze of Sto Lat]] - designed by Johnson and made more problematical when the blueprint got, er, interfered with.

==Devices==
*'''[[Johnson's Desktop Organiser]]'''; now used as a rather large and over-elaborate Tote board at the [[Shankydoodle]] race course.
*'''Great organ''', [[Don'tgonearthe Castle]], [[Überwald]]. Includes sound effects of thunder, young ladies screaming, wolf howls, floor creaks, and more. Operates on water power of an underground river.
*'''Organ''', the [[Opera House]], [[Ankh-Morpork]].
*'''Great organ''', the [[Unseen University]], Ankh-Morpork. Has three keyboards and a hundred knobs. Includes farmyard noises and the 128' Earthquake-pipe. Requires 8 students or one extremely enthusiastic Librarian to pump up the air reservoir.
*'''"Archchancellor Weatherwax's Bathroom"''', or, ''Patent 'Typhoon' Superior Indoor Ablutorium with Automatic Soap Dish'', Unseen University, Ankh-Morpork. Pipes are connected to the Unseen Great Organ (see above). [[Archchancellor]] [[Galder Weatherwax]] commissioned it, used it and boarded it up. Archchancellor [[Mustrum Ridcully]] re-opened it, tried it, loved it, met with an accident (fortunately not fatal) and boarded it up. One of the taps is named "Old Faithful", the name of a famous geyser in {{wp|Yellowstone Park|Yellowstone Park}}.

There are links here with Daedalus the inventor, who created Minos's bathroom. So far no one has been killed in Weatherwax's Bathroom (as far as we know).

*'''Mail-sorting engine''', the [[Post Office]], Ankh-Morpork. Originally designed as yet another organ (musical instrument). Acquired by Postmaster General Cowerby. In the centre of this machine is one wheel that Johnson, for the sake of tidiness, had designed to have a pi (circumference to diameter ratio) of exactly 3, not 3.14-mumble-mumble-and-a-bit. In order for pi to be exactly 3, the universe has been changed. The machine therefore taps through many layers of the space-time continuum. Mail came out of the sorting machine that wasn't put into it by the human hands of the postal workers. Mail from next week, mail from 50 years in the future, mail that could have been, mail from alternative universes, mail that people swore they posted but really hadn't, ''mountains'' of such mail. Finally, Chief Postal Inspector [[Rumbelow]] beat up the machine so that it stopped whirring. No longer sorting any mail, the machine still sports an annoying blue glow, and is capable of Considerably Dis-Organizing objects placed above its centre. This makes one of the rooms in the cellars, originally the mail-sorting room, a dangerous place to be. A banshee assassin exploded when he touched the core of the device.
*'''The Custard-Pie Machine''', designed for the Guild of Fools in order to put visitors in the appropriately mirthful frame of mind. Alas, Johnson under-estimated the effects of even quite thin runny custard when propelled at 300mph, and the device is now relegated to the museum of the Guild.
*'''The Great Daisy''': formerly the water-cannon, built in the shape of a giant daisy, that was to have been used to welcome visitors to the [[Fools' Guild]]. It is no longer in use and has been relegated to the Guild Museum following the unfortunate drowning incident.
*'''The Improved Manicure Device''': cited by Ridcully in {{H}} as to how not all of Bloody Stupid Johnson's inventions don't work: what about that thing in the kitchen, that they use for peeling potatoes? To which the [[Dean]] responds, "Ah, you mean the thing with the brass plate saying ''Improved Manicure Device'', Archchancellor?" Still, at least this blunder of Johnson's has been put to some good use. Explanation: industrial potato peelers, as used in large kitchens and high-volume catering outlets, take the form of a revolving steel drum inside a waterproof housing. The inside of the drum is serrated, like a large and evil cheesegrater, and is filled with up to a hundred large potatoes at a time. When the lid is closed and the drum set to rotate at high speed, the potatoes rumble around inside, their outer skins being shaved away by the serrations; water is passed through to flush the detritus out, and eventually a hundred slightly smaller and impeccably peeled spuds (or carrots, or parsnips, or turnips) are allowed to cascade out. While it ''could'' trim your fingernails, it is best not to attempt this as it might be regarded as overkill. In all probability you'd never need a manicure again.
*'''Clockwork spoon''': In {{UA}}, [[Nutt]] comments as to how the clockwork spoon, designed by Bergholt Stuttley Johnson, would probably be one of the four contenders for his favorite spoon. (He was being interviewed by [[Bu-Bubble]] at the time). As the name indicates, it was a spoon, powered by clockwork. not much else. Apparently, though, it worked so well that if you put it into a cup of tea, the cup would fly helicopter-like to the ceiling. Nutt would have loved to be a fly on the wall to observe it in operation- although, not too close, obviously...
* The '''Pneumatic Transit Tube''' now used, in a ''safe'' form, by department stores such as [[Crumley's]] to enable counter-clerks to send cash received to a central accounting office and to receive till floats and change. By inference, Johnson invented this, in his own inimitable way. An early and evidently prototype version was installed in 1815 (according to the {{AMPOH}}) to ostensibly make life easier for counter-clerks at the Post Office. However. Johnson's version propelled heavy metal tubes full of money at such a velocity that they could have been employed as artillery. Several holes exist in the walls which have been patched up but are still visible over a century on from 1815, the stated date of installation, and shell-strikes may still be seen on buildings opposite. The then Patrician, after representations from the then [[Iodine Maccalariat|Maccalariats]] of the day, promptly outlawed the device until it could be made safe.

==Landscaping==
*'''Artificial hillock''', right in front of [[Quirm Manor]]. Made of 2,000 tons of earth, because "it would drive me nuts to have to look at a bunch of trees and a lake all day, how about you?".
*'''The Gardens''', [[Patrician's Palace]], [[Ankh-Morpork]], with the following features:
**'''Beehive'''. So large that it could accommodate bees 10 feet long. Currently serving as dovecot. There is a suggestion that it has in the past been used to accommodate [[Pointless albatross|homing albatrosses]], the messenger birds between [[Ankh-Morpork]] and the [[Agatean Empire]].
**'''Chiming sundial'''. Usually explodes around noon. May also fall over.
**'''Crazy paving'''. Has committed suicide.
**'''Fountain'''. Currently defunct. Groaned ominously, then fired a small stone cherub 1,000 feet into the air 5 minutes after it was first switched on.
**'''Garden furniture'''. Made of cast iron. Known to have melted on three occasions.
**'''The Hoho'''. A cunningly designed ditch like a [[wikipedia:Ha-Ha|Haha]], only the Hoho is 50 feet deep. Has claimed three Palace gardeners. Also once trapped [[Cruces|Dr. Cruces]], then head of the [[Assassins' Guild]].
**'''Maze'''. Too small. People get lost ''looking for it''.
**'''Ornamental trout lake'''. 150 yards long, 1 inch wide. Home to one trout, living comfortably provided that it doesn't try to turn around. In fact, the turning around bit involves [[Re-Director|having a man to do this job on behalf of the fish]].

==Cookery==
*'''Wedding cake''', the top tier of which was until recently used as a bandstand in the [[Apothecary Gardens]].
*'''[[Bloody Stupid Johnson's Individual Fruit Pie|The Great Fruit Pie]]'''.

==Roundworld Comparisons==

In the spoof rockumentary movie ''This is Spinal Tap'', mention must be made of the B.S. Johnson moment when the band's manager totally fails to communicate with the stage-prop designer. In a truly Discworld moment, the conventional symbols for inches (") and feet (') are confused, and a Stonehenge-sized trilithon meant to be 18' x 12' - isn't. It is, however, 18" x 12". This adds a new poignancy to the lyric ''See the little people dance'', as the expensively-hired dwarf dancers proceed to hide the mighty trilithon with their bodies, and eventually kick it a little way across the stage.

Similarly, American and European agencies completely failed to liaise concerning a joint Mars rocket project. Little things like a standard system of measurement passed them by and while Europe used metric units, the USA thought in terms of feet and inches. Even a few millionths of an inch, or indeed a centimetre, of error when mating critical components was adequate to jointly engineer a very big, very expensive, firework. B.S. Johnson is alive and well and working for NASA. Or the ESA. Or both.

The government of the Republic of Ireland recently announced, proudly, that it had completed the changeover from the ambivalently-named Imperial system (a leftover of having been, largely unwillingly, part of the British Imperial system) to the European-standard Metric system of weights and measures. As one of Ireland's principal exports to the rest of the world is building contractors and labourers, it was immediately pointed out that most builders will still ask for - and be able to buy - a hundred metres of four-by-two, or a gross of 7mm diameter screws, or a box of 3/4 inch nails with 5mm heads. Clearly Irish metrification, with its gloriously Discworld gloss, needs more work.

In 1998, it was reported that the US State of Alabama had passed legislation redefining the value of Pi from 3.14159 to 3, in order to bring it in line with Biblical precepts. This has been proven to be an April Fools gag.[http://www.snopes.com/religion/pi.asp] That said, the {{wp|Indiana_Pi_Bill|Indiana Pi Bill}} really was nearly passed, and the details surrounding it are perhaps worthy of a Discworldian plot of their own.

Of his inventions:
*Colossus of Morpork = {{wp|Colossus_of_Rhodes|Colossus of Rhodes}} (a Wonder of the Ancient World)
*Hanging Gardens of Ankh = {{wp|Hanging_Gardens_of_Babylon|Hanging Gardens of Babylon}} (another Ancient Wonder) [technically in Semiramis, but hey...]
*Collapsed Tower of Quirm = {{wp|Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa|Leaning Tower of Pisa}}
*Organs: Extra sound effects mirror the strange, unrealistic sounds found on some electric keyboards. Only a few of Roundworld organs have a true 64' register from which the lowest notes produces sound at less than 20 Hz and therefore inaudible to the human ear. An 128' pipe would sound at approx. 8.2 Hz. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FXoyr_FyFw|The Sydney Town Hall organ with it's 64' Contra-Trombone in action]

Origin of name:
Three great gardeners are mentioned when Bloody Stupid Johnson was introduced in {{MAA}} as the landscaper responsible for the disastrous Patrician's Garden: Capability Brown, Sagacity Smith, and Intuition De Vere Slade-Gore. Of these,
{{wp|Capability_Brown|Capability Brown}} was a renowned landscaper. (As I'm sure Pterry remembered, the "Capability" part of Brown's name didn't refer to his own -- immense -- capability, but to his habit of applying the word to a garden when referring to what today we might instead call its "potential" for improvement.)

[[Category:Discworld characters|Johnson, Bergholt Stuttley]]
[[Category:Human characters|Johnson, Bergholt Stuttley]]
[[de:Bergholt Stuttley Johnson]]

Book title acronyms

2020-03-08T01:44:47Z

JesseW: add Mrs. Bradshaws

Special templates to make links to books consistent (and easier.) The table below contains the books and their template code.

{|style="width: 52em; border: 1px solid black; border-collapse:collapse;"

|-style="text-align: left; border: 1px solid black; "
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|<nowiki>{{UUD}}</nowiki> || {{UUD}} - ''Unseen University Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{AGD}}</nowiki> || {{AGD}} - ''Assassins' Guild Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{FGD}}</nowiki> || {{FGD}} - ''Fools' Guild Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{TGD}}</nowiki> || {{TGD}} - ''Thieves' Guild Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{LTYOE}}</nowiki> || {{LTYOE}} - ''Lu-Tze's Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{APMMW}}</nowiki> || {{APMMW}} - ''Witches Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{TPD}}</nowiki> || {{TPD}} - ''Terry Pratchett Diary''

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|<nowiki>{{AMAV1}}</nowiki> || {{AMAV1}} - ''Ankh-Morpork Archives Volume One''

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[[Category:Title shortcut templates|Book title acronyms]]

Template:MB

2020-03-08T01:43:19Z

JesseW: Created page with "''Mrs Bradshaw's Handbook''{{{1|}}}<noinclude> Category:Title shortcut templates </noinclude>"

''[[Book:Mrs Bradshaw's Handbook|Mrs Bradshaw's Handbook]]''{{{1|}}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Title shortcut templates]]
</noinclude>

Sto Kerrig

2020-03-08T01:37:23Z

JesseW: mention attack on clacks tower

'''Sto Kerrig''' was first mentioned in the novel {{M}}. Sto Kerrig is a small city-state on the [[Sto Plains]], recently a protectorate of the Monarchy of [[Sto Lat]]. However, it seems that the Monarchy attaches far more importance to a Long Thin Debated Piece just Hubwards of the city. One of its rulers was assassinated due to a contract placed by the then Duke of [[Sto Helit]], a cunning man with a plan to murder his way to the throne of Sto Lat and then unite the kingdoms into a powerful confederacy on the Sto Plains.

One of the [[clacks]] towers serving it was attacked by [[grag]]s early in {{RS|(p. 65)}}.

It receives a far longer description in ''Mrs Bradshaw's Handbook to the Railways''. It is the terminus of the [[Sto Plains Line]] spur line from [[Huddle]]. The city is situated on the River [[Sour]] and is the centre of a thriving cabbage-based papermaking industry. It manufactures the cabbage-based adhesive used by the Post Office on its 50p "celebration of the Sto Plains cabbage industry" stamps. [[Remnant Hall]], home of the acclaimed portrait painter [[Josiah Remnant]] is here and is a local tourist attraction. The Great Battle of Sto Kerrig happened here in 1642. surrounding fields grow the fine white-leaved Bockingfield cabbage, which is converted into luxury paper by local artisans.

[[Category:Discworld geography]]
[[Category: locations]]
[[Category: Railway Lines]]
[[de:Sto Kerrig]]

Shine on the Moon

2020-03-08T01:32:14Z

JesseW: Created page with "'''Shine on the Moon''' is a goblin worker on the clacks, who, along with Shatter of the Icicle, was on duty at the tower in Sto Kerrig when the grags attacked..."

'''Shine on the Moon''' is a goblin worker on the [[clacks]], who, along with [[Shatter of the Icicle]], was on duty at the tower in [[Sto Kerrig]] when the [[grag]]s attacked, in {{RS|, p. 65}}. Shine on the Moon might have had something to do with one of the attackers not being in a position to make any further attacks (or do anything else).

[[Category:Goblins]]

Shatter of the Icicle

2020-03-08T01:24:34Z

JesseW: Created page with "'''Shatter of the Icicle''' is a goblin worker on the clacks, who, along with Shine on the Moon, was on duty at the tower in Sto Kerrig when the grags attacked..."

'''Shatter of the Icicle''' is a goblin worker on the [[clacks]], who, along with [[Shine on the Moon]], was on duty at the tower in [[Sto Kerrig]] when the [[grag]]s attacked, in {{RS|, p. 65}}.

[[Category:Goblins]]

Book:Lu Tse's Yearbook of Englightenment 2008

2020-03-07T06:43:11Z

JesseW: fix typo

#REDIRECT [[Book:Lu-Tze's Yearbook of Enlightenment 2008]]

Category:Templates

2020-03-07T05:53:24Z

JesseW:

Templates are an excellent way of making complicated thing simple.
[[Category:Wiki Data]]

Talk:Sandbox

2020-03-07T05:43:09Z

JesseW: the talk page doesn't exist, so might as well redirect to the page itself

#REDIRECT [[Discworld & Pratchett Wiki:Sandbox]]

Talk:The Colour of Magic

2020-03-07T05:40:59Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Talk:Book:The Colour of Magic

#REDIRECT [[Talk:Book:The Colour of Magic]]

Fandom

2020-03-06T06:28:35Z

JesseW: missed one

==External links==

*[http://www.lspace.org The L-Space Web] - ''Everything'' about Discworld (including this Wiki.)

==Newsgroups==

* [news://alt.fan.pratchett alt.fan.pratchett] - opens [[alt.fan.pratchett]] in your default mail client
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.fan.pratchett alt.fan.pratchett] on [[Wikipedia:Google_(search_engine)|Google Groups]]
* [news://alt.fan.pratchett.announce alt.fan.pratchett.announce]
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.fan.pratchett.announce alt.fan.pratchett.announce] on Google Groups
* [news://alt.book.pratchett alt.books.pratchett]
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.books.pratchett alt.books.pratchett] on Google Groups
* [news://de.alt.fan.pratchett de.alt.fan.pratchett] - German fan newsgroup
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/de.alt.fan.pratchett de.alt.fan.pratchett] on Google Groups

==Publishers' Websites==

* [http://www.terrypratchett.co.uk/ Terry Pratchett] - Bibliography, forums and features from Verlagsgruppe Random House / Doubleday / etc.
* [http://www.terrypratchettbooks.com/ Terry Pratchett Books] - A very active forum with members from around the world. Main page also includes current news and information about the books and Terry Pratchett. (HarperCollins)

==Blogs and Discussion==

* [http://www.affordable-prawns.co.uk/planet Planet afp] - A collection of afpers' weblogs.
* [http://www.electric-escape.net/pratchett Terry Pratchett Quotes] - A collection of quotations from Pratchett's novels and stories.
* [http://www.discworldmonthly.co.uk Discworld Monthly] - A free monthly newsletter about the Discworld.
* [http://goodomenslexicon.org/index.php The Good Omens Lexicon] - a fan site dedicated to this one book, and worth visiting
* [https://clacksheader.wordpress.com Clacks Header] - A collection of articles, eulogies, fanfiction and other bits and pieces gathered from various sources.

==National Sites==

* [http://www.Ankh-Morpork.de Ankh-Morpork.de] - The German Terry Pratchett Fan Club
* [http://www.discworld.cz www.discworld.cz] - The biggest Czech web page about Discworld
* [http://www.dwcon.org/ DWCon] UK ''[[Discworld]]'' Convention (1996, 1998, 2002, 2004, 2006, 2008, 2010, 2012, 2014)
* [http://www.ausdwcon.org Nullus Anxietas] - The Australian ''[[Discworld]]'' Convention (2007, 2009, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2015, 2017, 2019, 2021)
* [http://www.discworld-convention.de Dicscworld-Convention.de] - The German ''[[Discworld]]'' Convention (2007, 2009, 2011, 2015, 2017, 2019)
* [http://www.dutchdwcon.nl/ Cabbagecon] - Dutch Discworld Convention
* [http://www.nadwcon.org/ NADWCON] - The official site for the first North American Discworld Convention (2009)
* [http://www.vademecum-dm.com/index.php Vade Mecum] - a very good French-language site for Francophone fans of Terry Pratchett
* [http://dreamers.com/mundodisco/ La Concha de Gran'A'Tuin] - A Pratchett fan site in Spanish
* [http://pratchett.org pratchett.org] - a very good Russian-language site for CIS fans of Sir Terry
* [http://www.idwcon.org The Irish Discworld Convention]
* [http://www.pratchett.pl/ Pratchett.pl] - a rather comprehensive Polish site that has been hiding from us for some time. Includes a [http://www.pratchett.pl/pratchettopedia.html Pratchettopedia]

==Peripherals==

*[http://www.paulkidby.com Paul Kidby's homepage] - Discworld art and news.
*[https://www.discworldemporium.com/ The Discworld Emporium] - creators and vendors of objets de Discworld art.
*[[Discworld MUD]] - A text {{wp|Massively multiplayer online game|MMO}} game started in 1991, based heavily on Pratchett's work. [http://discworld.atuin.net Link to website]
*[http://www.nocturnalsoldier.org/Tealin/xhp/disc/index.html Discworld & Pratchett Paraphernalia], a wealth of illustrations by Tealin.
*[[Micro Art Studios]][http://www.shop.microartstudio.com/ - A Polish miniature manufacturer] - A company making miniatures for RPGs and collecting with a discworld range.
*An archive of [http://web.archive.org/web/20081212000857/http://www.cheerycomic.co.uk/ ''Cheerycomic''] via the Wayback Machine - a good resource for Dwarves and the Watch.
*[[Ankh-Morpork MUSH]] - a text {{wp|Massively multiplayer online game|MMO}} game started in 2019, based on Pratchett's depiction of Ankh-Morpork at the end of the novel series. [http://discworld.mush.website Link to website]

==Forums==

* [http://z6.invisionfree.com/Dungeon_Dimensions Dungeon Dimensions] - A forum dedicated to Discworld. Not very active but a nice community feel.
* [http://z3.invisionfree.com/DWExtended Discworld Extended] - A new forum for Discworld chat, fan fiction, games and roleplay.
* [http://forum.discworldemporium.com/ Discworld Emporium Forum] - Set up by [[Bernard Pearson]], a discussion point for all things Pratchett.
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/discworld/ /r/Discworld] - A subreddit (sub-forum) of Reddit, "dedicated to the weird and wonderful Discworld". Reasonably active.

==Wikis==

* [http://pterryfanon.wikia.com/wiki/Discworld_Fanon_Wiki Pratchett Fanon Wiki] - A repository for all things Pratchett fanon. Feel free to use this for inspiration.
*[http://thelongearth.wikia.com/wiki/The_long_Earth_Wiki The Long Earth Wiki] - A great source for information on the Long Earth Series.
*[http://discworld.wikia.com/wiki/Main_Page Discworld Wiki] - The other Discworld Wikia.
*[http://www.thediscworld.de DiscWiki] - the German-language Discworld wiki.

==Podcasts==

* [https://radiomorpork.wordpress.com/ Radio Morpork] - a Discworld podcast. Hosts Colm and Steve read each Discworld book in order, and create rankings. Launched August 2015; episodes released sporadically.
* [http://pratchatpodcast.com Pratchat] - a monthly Terry Pratchett book club podcast. Hosts Elizabeth Flux and Ben McKenzie read and discuss every Pratchett book (not just the Discworld), each with a special guest. Launched November 2017.
* [http://thetruthshallmakeyefret.buzzsprout.com The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret] - a weekly Discworld podcast. Hosts Joanna Hagan-Young and Francine Carrel read and recap every Discworld book in order, over three episodes for each book with a week off in between. Launched November 2019.
* [https://www.desertislanddiscworld.com Desert Island Discworld] - a Discworld interview podcast. Host Al Kennedy interviews a variety of guests about their favourite Discworld books. Launched November 2019; released weekly in seasons of six episodes.
* [https://www.compleatdiscography.page/ The Compleat Discography] - a Discworld fancast. “Four nerds” do a book club style read-through of the Discworld novels and related works, in publication order. Occasionally special guests; also intend to cover ''[[TV and Film:The Watch|The Watch]]''. Launched January 2020; released fortnightly, at least at launch.

==Teaching Guides==
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Amazing-Maurice-Educated-Rodents-Respond/dp/1407160567 ''The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents (Read & Respond)''], by Eileen Jones, Scholastic, 1st September 2016.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Summary-Long-Earth-Terry-Pratchett/dp/1388253062 ''Summary of The Long Earth by Terry Pratchett''], WhizBooks, 25th July 2018.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Omens-Terry-Pratchett-Gaiman-Analysis/dp/2808018886 ''Good Omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman'']], Bright Summaries, 8th April 2019.

==Criticism, biography, commentary==

*[http://www.sfsite.com/~silverag/literature.html ''Terry Pratchett Guilty of Literature'']. The Science Fiction Foundation, 2000, edited by Andrew M. Butler, Edward James and Farah Mendlesohn.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/So-You-Think-Know-Discworld/dp/0340917326 ''So You Think You Know Discworld''] Hodder Children's Books, 2006, by Clive Gifford. Unofficial quiz book unlike the [[Book:The Unseen University Challenge|other]] [[Book:The Wyrdest Link|two]] by Dave Langford which were endorsed by Terry.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Unofficial-Companion-Novels-Terry-Pratchett/dp/1846450012 ''An Unofficial Companion to the Novels of Terry Pratchett''] Greenwood World Publishing, 2007, Andrew M. Butler.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Terry-Pratchett-Writers-Uncovered-Parker/dp/0431906432| ''Terry Pratchett (Writers Uncovered)''] Heinemann Library, 2007, Vic Parker.
*[http://www.sfsite.com/08a/tm277.htm ''The Turtle Moves'']. Benbella Books, 2008, by American commentator on all things Pratchett, {{wp|Lawrence Watt-Evans|Lawrence Watt-Evans}}
*[http://www.amazon.com/Secrets-The-Wee-Free-Discworld/dp/B004JZWRNA| ''Secrets of The Wee Free Men and Discworld: The Myths and Legends of Terry Pratchett's Multiverse''] by Carrie Pyykkonen and Linda Washington, 2008, St. Martin's Griffin.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Terry-Pratchett-Fantasy-Craig-Cabell/dp/1843585073 ''Terry Pratchett-The Spirit of Fantasy''] by Craig Cabell, John Blake Publishing, 2011. (£17.99 UK). An entertaining and well-written book about Terry, part unauthorised biography, part literary criticism. Rumour has it this book has landed in remaindered bins at less than a fiver, a fate something as good as this does not deserve. (But see Amazon "customer reviews" for some violent disagreement.)
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1137360151 ''Philosophy and Terry Pratchett''] edited by Jacob Held and James South, 2014, Palgrave Macmillan.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Discworld-Disciplines-Approaches-Pratchett-Explorations/dp/0786474645 ''Discworld and the Disciplines: Critical Approaches to the Terry Pratchett Works''] by Anne Hiebert Alton and William C. Spruiell, 2014, McFarland & Co Inc.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Memory-Tribute-Sir-Terry-Pratchett/dp/1517603609 ''In Memory: A Tribute To Sir Terry Pratchett''] by Sorin Suciu (editor), 2015, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Discworld-Philosophy-Popular-Culture/dp/081269919X ''Discworld and Philosophy''] by Nicolas Michaud (editor), 2016, Cricket Books.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Terry-Pratchetts-Narrative-Worlds-Approaches/dp/3319672975 ''Terry Pratchett's Narrative Worlds: From Giant Turtles to Small Gods''] by Marion Rana (editor), 11th January 2018, Palgrave Macmillan.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Magic-Terry-Pratchett-Marc-Burrows/dp/1526765500 ''The Magic of Terry Pratchett''] by Marc Burrows, 30th July 2020, Pen & Sword History.

==See also:==
*[[Fan fiction]]
*[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Literature/Discworld?from=Main.Discworld TV tropes] - a really neat and entertaining site discussing the recurring "tropes", ie literary shortcuts, stereotypes and literary conventions present in TV, literature and art. A lot of space is given over to Pratchett's work, detailing how the tropes, those conventions, hooks and short-cuts present in the universal consciousness of all creative writers, work in the Discworld.

Now introducing:
*[[Fan-Art]]
*[[Fan Films]]

[[Category:Fandom|Fandom]]

Fandom

2020-03-06T06:26:40Z

JesseW: remove tracking links

==External links==

*[http://www.lspace.org The L-Space Web] - ''Everything'' about Discworld (including this Wiki.)

==Newsgroups==

* [news://alt.fan.pratchett alt.fan.pratchett] - opens [[alt.fan.pratchett]] in your default mail client
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.fan.pratchett alt.fan.pratchett] on [[Wikipedia:Google_(search_engine)|Google Groups]]
* [news://alt.fan.pratchett.announce alt.fan.pratchett.announce]
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.fan.pratchett.announce alt.fan.pratchett.announce] on Google Groups
* [news://alt.book.pratchett alt.books.pratchett]
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/alt.books.pratchett alt.books.pratchett] on Google Groups
* [news://de.alt.fan.pratchett de.alt.fan.pratchett] - German fan newsgroup
** [http://groups.google.co.uk/group/de.alt.fan.pratchett de.alt.fan.pratchett] on Google Groups

==Publishers' Websites==

* [http://www.terrypratchett.co.uk/ Terry Pratchett] - Bibliography, forums and features from Verlagsgruppe Random House / Doubleday / etc.
* [http://www.terrypratchettbooks.com/ Terry Pratchett Books] - A very active forum with members from around the world. Main page also includes current news and information about the books and Terry Pratchett. (HarperCollins)

==Blogs and Discussion==

* [http://www.affordable-prawns.co.uk/planet Planet afp] - A collection of afpers' weblogs.
* [http://www.electric-escape.net/pratchett Terry Pratchett Quotes] - A collection of quotations from Pratchett's novels and stories.
* [http://www.discworldmonthly.co.uk Discworld Monthly] - A free monthly newsletter about the Discworld.
* [http://goodomenslexicon.org/index.php The Good Omens Lexicon] - a fan site dedicated to this one book, and worth visiting
* [https://clacksheader.wordpress.com Clacks Header] - A collection of articles, eulogies, fanfiction and other bits and pieces gathered from various sources.

==National Sites==

* [http://www.Ankh-Morpork.de Ankh-Morpork.de] - The German Terry Pratchett Fan Club
* [http://www.discworld.cz www.discworld.cz] - The biggest Czech web page about Discworld
* [http://www.dwcon.org/ DWCon] UK ''[[Discworld]]'' Convention (1996, 1998, 2002, 2004, 2006, 2008, 2010, 2012, 2014)
* [http://www.ausdwcon.org Nullus Anxietas] - The Australian ''[[Discworld]]'' Convention (2007, 2009, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2015, 2017, 2019, 2021)
* [http://www.discworld-convention.de Dicscworld-Convention.de] - The German ''[[Discworld]]'' Convention (2007, 2009, 2011, 2015, 2017, 2019)
* [http://www.dutchdwcon.nl/ Cabbagecon] - Dutch Discworld Convention
* [http://www.nadwcon.org/ NADWCON] - The official site for the first North American Discworld Convention (2009)
* [http://www.vademecum-dm.com/index.php Vade Mecum] - a very good French-language site for Francophone fans of Terry Pratchett
* [http://dreamers.com/mundodisco/ La Concha de Gran'A'Tuin] - A Pratchett fan site in Spanish
* [http://pratchett.org pratchett.org] - a very good Russian-language site for CIS fans of Sir Terry
* [http://www.idwcon.org The Irish Discworld Convention]
* [http://www.pratchett.pl/ Pratchett.pl] - a rather comprehensive Polish site that has been hiding from us for some time. Includes a [http://www.pratchett.pl/pratchettopedia.html Pratchettopedia]

==Peripherals==

*[http://www.paulkidby.com Paul Kidby's homepage] - Discworld art and news.
*[https://www.discworldemporium.com/ The Discworld Emporium] - creators and vendors of objets de Discworld art.
*[[Discworld MUD]] - A text {{wp|Massively multiplayer online game|MMO}} game started in 1991, based heavily on Pratchett's work. [http://discworld.atuin.net Link to website]
*[http://www.nocturnalsoldier.org/Tealin/xhp/disc/index.html Discworld & Pratchett Paraphernalia], a wealth of illustrations by Tealin.
*[[Micro Art Studios]][http://www.shop.microartstudio.com/ - A Polish miniature manufacturer] - A company making miniatures for RPGs and collecting with a discworld range.
*An archive of [http://web.archive.org/web/20081212000857/http://www.cheerycomic.co.uk/ ''Cheerycomic''] via the Wayback Machine - a good resource for Dwarves and the Watch.
*[[Ankh-Morpork MUSH]] - a text {{wp|Massively multiplayer online game|MMO}} game started in 2019, based on Pratchett's depiction of Ankh-Morpork at the end of the novel series. [http://discworld.mush.website Link to website]

==Forums==

* [http://z6.invisionfree.com/Dungeon_Dimensions Dungeon Dimensions] - A forum dedicated to Discworld. Not very active but a nice community feel.
* [http://z3.invisionfree.com/DWExtended Discworld Extended] - A new forum for Discworld chat, fan fiction, games and roleplay.
* [http://forum.discworldemporium.com/ Discworld Emporium Forum] - Set up by [[Bernard Pearson]], a discussion point for all things Pratchett.
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/discworld/ /r/Discworld] - A subreddit (sub-forum) of Reddit, "dedicated to the weird and wonderful Discworld". Reasonably active.

==Wikis==

* [http://pterryfanon.wikia.com/wiki/Discworld_Fanon_Wiki Pratchett Fanon Wiki] - A repository for all things Pratchett fanon. Feel free to use this for inspiration.
*[http://thelongearth.wikia.com/wiki/The_long_Earth_Wiki The Long Earth Wiki] - A great source for information on the Long Earth Series.
*[http://discworld.wikia.com/wiki/Main_Page Discworld Wiki] - The other Discworld Wikia.
*[http://www.thediscworld.de DiscWiki] - the German-language Discworld wiki.

==Podcasts==

* [https://radiomorpork.wordpress.com/ Radio Morpork] - a Discworld podcast. Hosts Colm and Steve read each Discworld book in order, and create rankings. Launched August 2015; episodes released sporadically.
* [http://pratchatpodcast.com Pratchat] - a monthly Terry Pratchett book club podcast. Hosts Elizabeth Flux and Ben McKenzie read and discuss every Pratchett book (not just the Discworld), each with a special guest. Launched November 2017.
* [http://thetruthshallmakeyefret.buzzsprout.com The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret] - a weekly Discworld podcast. Hosts Joanna Hagan-Young and Francine Carrel read and recap every Discworld book in order, over three episodes for each book with a week off in between. Launched November 2019.
* [https://www.desertislanddiscworld.com Desert Island Discworld] - a Discworld interview podcast. Host Al Kennedy interviews a variety of guests about their favourite Discworld books. Launched November 2019; released weekly in seasons of six episodes.
* [https://www.compleatdiscography.page/ The Compleat Discography] - a Discworld fancast. “Four nerds” do a book club style read-through of the Discworld novels and related works, in publication order. Occasionally special guests; also intend to cover ''[[TV and Film:The Watch|The Watch]]''. Launched January 2020; released fortnightly, at least at launch.

==Teaching Guides==
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Amazing-Maurice-Educated-Rodents-Respond/dp/1407160567 ''The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents (Read & Respond)''], by Eileen Jones, Scholastic, 1st September 2016.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Summary-Long-Earth-Terry-Pratchett/dp/1388253062 ''Summary of The Long Earth by Terry Pratchett''], WhizBooks, 25th July 2018.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Omens-Terry-Pratchett-Gaiman-Analysis/dp/2808018886 ''Good Omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman'']], Bright Summaries, 8th April 2019.

==Criticism, biography, commentary==

*[http://www.sfsite.com/~silverag/literature.html ''Terry Pratchett Guilty of Literature'']. The Science Fiction Foundation, 2000, edited by Andrew M. Butler, Edward James and Farah Mendlesohn.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/So-You-Think-Know-Discworld/dp/0340917326 ''So You Think You Know Discworld''] Hodder Children's Books, 2006, by Clive Gifford. Unofficial quiz book unlike the [[Book:The Unseen University Challenge|other]] [[Book:The Wyrdest Link|two]] by Dave Langford which were endorsed by Terry.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Unofficial-Companion-Novels-Terry-Pratchett/dp/1846450012 ''An Unofficial Companion to the Novels of Terry Pratchett''] Greenwood World Publishing, 2007, Andrew M. Butler.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Terry-Pratchett-Writers-Uncovered-Parker/dp/0431906432| ''Terry Pratchett (Writers Uncovered)''] Heinemann Library, 2007, Vic Parker.
*[http://www.sfsite.com/08a/tm277.htm ''The Turtle Moves'']. Benbella Books, 2008, by American commentator on all things Pratchett, {{wp|Lawrence Watt-Evans|Lawrence Watt-Evans}}
*[http://www.amazon.com/Secrets-The-Wee-Free-Discworld/dp/B004JZWRNA| ''Secrets of The Wee Free Men and Discworld: The Myths and Legends of Terry Pratchett's Multiverse''] by Carrie Pyykkonen and Linda Washington, 2008, St. Martin's Griffin.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Terry-Pratchett-Fantasy-Craig-Cabell/dp/1843585073 ''Terry Pratchett-The Spirit of Fantasy''] by Craig Cabell, John Blake Publishing, 2011. (£17.99 UK). An entertaining and well-written book about Terry, part unauthorised biography, part literary criticism. Rumour has it this book has landed in remaindered bins at less than a fiver, a fate something as good as this does not deserve. (But see Amazon "customer reviews" for some violent disagreement.)
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1137360151 ''Philosophy and Terry Pratchett''] edited by Jacob Held and James South, 2014, Palgrave Macmillan.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Discworld-Disciplines-Approaches-Pratchett-Explorations/dp/0786474645 ''Discworld and the Disciplines: Critical Approaches to the Terry Pratchett Works''] by Anne Hiebert Alton and William C. Spruiell, 2014, McFarland & Co Inc.
*[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Memory-Tribute-Sir-Terry-Pratchett/dp/1517603609 ''In Memory: A Tribute To Sir Terry Pratchett''] by Sorin Suciu (editor), 2015, CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Discworld-Philosophy-Popular-Culture/dp/081269919X/ref=sr_1_79?ie=UTF8&qid=1472727783&sr=8-79&keywords=discworld/ ''Discworld and Philosophy''] by Nicolas Michaud (editor), 2016, Cricket Books.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Terry-Pratchetts-Narrative-Worlds-Approaches/dp/3319672975 ''Terry Pratchett's Narrative Worlds: From Giant Turtles to Small Gods''] by Marion Rana (editor), 11th January 2018, Palgrave Macmillan.
*[https://www.amazon.co.uk/Magic-Terry-Pratchett-Marc-Burrows/dp/1526765500 ''The Magic of Terry Pratchett''] by Marc Burrows, 30th July 2020, Pen & Sword History.

==See also:==
*[[Fan fiction]]
*[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Literature/Discworld?from=Main.Discworld TV tropes] - a really neat and entertaining site discussing the recurring "tropes", ie literary shortcuts, stereotypes and literary conventions present in TV, literature and art. A lot of space is given over to Pratchett's work, detailing how the tropes, those conventions, hooks and short-cuts present in the universal consciousness of all creative writers, work in the Discworld.

Now introducing:
*[[Fan-Art]]
*[[Fan Films]]

[[Category:Fandom|Fandom]]

Template:RS

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''[[Book:Raising Steam|Raising Steam]]''{{{1|}}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Title shortcut templates|RS]]
</noinclude>

McSweeneys

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One of the five noble families in the [[Agatean Empire]] who wrestle for the rule of the [[Counterweight continent]] and periodically succeed in getting a member enthroned as Emperor.

The McSweeneys are a very old established family, despite their name which doesn't fit in with the other four houses: [[Sungs]], [[Tangs]], [[Hongs]] and the [[Fangs]].

After the success of the revolutionaries establishment of a [[People's Beneficent Republic of Agatea|Republic]] after the fall of the Empire, several members of the McSweeneys moved to the neighbouring island of [[Nafooi]] to try to continue the old empire.

A jug "from the McSweeney dynasty" is mentioned in passing as being owned (and destroyed) by [[Effie King]] in {{RS|, p. 28}}.

==Annotation==
The McSweeneys might even be described as a '''Noble House'''... refer to James Clavell's [[wikipedia:Noble_House|novel]] of the same name concerning the machinations of the founding families who built Hong Kong and established Anglo-Chinese trading dynasties. In particular Dirk Straun who, like the McSweeneys, has a Scottish name.

[[Category:Groups]]
[[de:McSweeney]]

McSweeney

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#REDIRECT [[McSweeneys]]

Rat Pack

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JesseW: add page number

Identified in {{RS| (p. 24)}}, this is a specific named group under the aegis of the [[Ankh-Morpork Scouting (and possibly Urban Survival) Federation]]. Principally composed of [[Dwarfs]], there are several fully accepted [[Trolls|troll]] members. [[Magnus Magnusson]], a Dwarf who runs into trouble in [[Bonk-Schmaltzberg]], is a member. As incidental information we are told that there is a membership badge which is worn on the back of a (reversed) helmet.

[[Category: Groups]]

Ankh-Morpork Rat Pack

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#REDIRECT [[Rat Pack]]

Fat Marie's

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JesseW: Created page with "An eatery along the Quirm turnpike, run by the eponymous Fat Marie. In {{RS|, p. 176}} Moist expands the proprietor's view of acceptable customers to include [[goblin]..."

An eatery along the [[Quirm]] turnpike, run by the eponymous Fat Marie. In {{RS|, p. 176}} [[Moist]] expands the proprietor's view of acceptable customers to include [[goblin]]s.
[[Category:Food and drink]]

Moist

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#REDIRECT [[Moist von Lipwig]]

User talk:Old Dickens

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JesseW: /* Category pages to delete */ new section

Thanks for the spelling stuff, as you may know English is not my first language :) --[[User:Sanity|Sanity]] 00:51, 13 January 2007 (CET)

Hard to tell,usually, but we expect the average Dutchman to speak better English than the average Canadian (never mind Americans.) It occurred to me yesterday, though, that your English seems practically perfect on AF/BP, or here in the internal communication, but you make more mistakes in compositions. Seems odd, but maybe it's just familiarity with a style...--[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 20:38, 13 January 2007 (CET)

I suppose that depends on whether killing Vorbis counts as smiting...--[[User:acgs1|acgs1]]

I would not edit it if it was not mentioned a Polish cuisine. I checked the only word which sounded similar (and describing similar concept) and I've checked its translation by wikipedia. In Polish cuisine I've never met other fat then pork fat as "Smalec" - especially that since recently (i.e. 20 c) chicken was considered rather expensive dish and it wasn't common meat. Either way the information was incorrect (as chicken fat is not the only one and at least in one cuisine from two mentioned not the most popular).

Yiddish origin of English makes little change as Yiddish was a language of Ashkenazi Jewish and originiated as some sort of mixture of Hebrew and German with addition of other languages. Probably thay trasfered the method of using the fat with the exception of pork for well-known religios issues. But [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schmaltz wikipedia] is unclear on this issue (it was so german-sounding I haven't check on english wikipedia only checking the translation - which is my error).

According to my knowledge (I used to learn french and I haven't everything forget I hope) ''Laissez-faire'' means literary ''please let us do''. I have met it only in connection with economics and I've never met it in English in any other context. As it is english-language wiki it would imply this conection - however I'm far from being a native speaker so I prefered to ask for clarification. --[[User:uzytkownik|uzytkownik]]

== Pronouns ==

I thought "their" was the correct use when the person is unidentified. Or has political correctness been thrown out of the door and are we going back to "his" instead of "their"? --[[User:Sanity|Sanity]] 19:45, 15 May 2007 (CEST)

Well, that's a toughie when The Author Himself avoids agreement of number at all costs. I don't think you could call it correct, but everybody's certainly doing it (like greengrocer's apostrophes.) We could make it an internal convention - one never knows, do they?

Is the same thing happening in Dutch? You must have had agreement of number, too. ("Your" didn't fit, anyway.}--[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 21:08, 15 May 2007 (CEST)

There is a distinction in number, but considering that there are several houses in [[Empirical Crescent]], "their" seems justified. And yes, it'd be the same issue in Dutch. --[[User:Sanity|Sanity]] 22:22, 15 May 2007 (CEST)

:Only, you weren't referring to several houses; the subjects were "everybody" and "someone", singular. Nope, you can get away with it because it's PC, or because all the kids are doing it, or (especially here) because Pterry does it, but you can't pretend it makes sense.--[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 16:10, 16 May 2007 (CEST)

:Not only does Pterry do it, Shakespeare did it, Dickens did it, Austen did it, Thackeray did it. It's been extant in English as long as modern English has existed--[[User:Attercop|Attercop]] 07:04, 12 May 2009 (UTC)

Unfortunately true. The other day I heard a radio columnist refer first to "managers" (pl) as "he or she" before reverting to singular they for one "manager". Agreement of number is pretty much dead, but "one never knows, do they?" still sounds silly to me. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 13:35, 12 May 2009 (UTC)

== Help??!? ==

this is probably bleedin' obvious, but how do you quickly type the slash that you need to separate, for example, werewolves from werewolf, as you just did? i keep having to open another page and cut and paste it. duh indeed, but i just don't get it! sob! --[[User:Knmatt|Knmatt]] 22:06, 28 May 2007 (CEST)

It's a '''pipe''', (Shift-Backslash, just above Return, usually.) If you don't go back to DOS you may never have used it.--[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 22:11, 28 May 2007 (CEST)

==Patrician==
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Havelock_Vetinari
Bibliography section, check it out. From Pratchett himself, it says that originally he was overweight, and then lost weight - i.e., Pratchett became a better writer himself.
:But that refers to earlier books (I provided the quote from {{S}}.) Even The Author seems to have softened his (untenable) position on the single-Patrician theory, anyway. (Remember : Pterry only invented the Discworld; we live there.)--[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 16:47, 31 May 2007 (CEST)

== that was quick ==

you blocked the spammer just as i logged in to todo. :)
:You're up even earlier than I am on a Sunday morning? Get a life! --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 14:59, 4 May 2008 (UTC)

== i.e. [[Piecemaker]] ==
Yeah, I meant that in physical size, it may or may not be larger, but it is a certainly more powerful firearm. [[Special:Contributions/64.231.240.44|64.231.240.44]] 03:30, 1 November 2008 (UTC)

== Featured Articles ==

Just a small question, are featured articlees good articles that deserve recognition (as on wikipedia) or are they bad articles of topics that could be good? Thanks for your time. :) --[[User:Beligaronia|Beligaronia]] 06:37, 1 December 2008 (UTC)

Typically, they're fairly good articles on important topics that Sanity or someone thought should be bigger and better. Certainly the idea is to improve them, not praise them. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 15:08, 1 December 2008 (UTC)

== re: Polish Discworld wiki ==

Thanks for your answer. Personally I prefer the layout of the wiki, as here I know ho to edit etc.
Mayby you could tell me how to start a new one? I mean the Polish one. If of course it is not too complicated. Then step by step it could grow up.
[[User:NoychoH|noychoH]] 18:16, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

:You're asking the wrong person, here. I'm not any kind of software developer. This one was set up by our admin, [[User:Sanity|Sanity]]; [[User:Death|Death]] operates the German version (where he's known as Tod), and our sysop [[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] seems to be knowledgeable about the inner workings. Anyone can download the program from [http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/MediaWiki/pl MediaWiki], but configuring and providing the support is a job for a professional or a gifted and experienced amateur. I just fill in the pages. Go to the MediaWiki site and see if you feel capable. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 19:01, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

==Career Change==

Thanks old man. Very good of you. And yes: it's an ''awful'' lot better than dealing with 'em at 6!

== They may think it's all over ==

I saw the dedication to the "stenographer" and thought immediatly of {{GO}} where Pterry states (to the effect, I can't remember the exact phrasing) "It's impossible to know what Neil contributed and what I contributed but it was mostly me sitting at the keyboard". The dedication meant for me the first tangible proof of Pterry's illness/embuggerance. Nevertheless the changes of pace and turnings of phrase is, in my mind, not a sharp difference in light of the development over twenty years of writing.

The major weakness of {{UA}}, in my mind, is the appearence of several characters that appears as ''Deus Ex Machina'', Lady Margolotta, Vetinari trusting Glenda Sugarbean because of her grandmother, puhleese. It's too neat.

:I don't think those are really ''dei ex machina''; the god(dess) is Pedestriana, and on Discworld this sort of thing isn't unusual. There really are gods who do affect events. It's more of a problem that she isn't developed much. She crashes in at the beginning and returns at the end but we're not sure why. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 22:51, 28 October 2009 (UTC)

::By ''Deus ex Machina'' I meant the dramatic principle of concluding a drama by having an all-powerful character appear out of nowhere to settle all impasses. Normaly this implies weakness of the plot; ''Deus ex Machina'' is used as a deragotory term towards the author. There are indeed gods but I wasn't referring to any of those.
::On totally different note, it's been more than twenty years since I had English in school; I feel my grammar and spelling is slipping badly --[[User:Iron Hippo|Iron Hippo]] 18:22, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

:My point. That's what it means but those characters don't do that, Pedestriana does. The English is pretty good though, apart from some some spelling which isn't worse than many others. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 19:07, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

I'll develop my thoughts on football (soccer as merkins call it) in comparison to merkin sports but I need to think it through a bit more. In the meantime merkins: Do read Nick Hornby: Fever Pitch --[[User:Iron Hippo|Iron Hippo]] 01:30, 28 October 2009 (UTC)

:Agreed about Glenda Sugarbean. But I liked Unseen Academicals, for the most part, although I did notice some slight differences between it and prior books. Most noticeably: slight character changes and heavy reference to previous books.

:But Death does actually appear... "Death stood by the well-scrubbed slab and looked down. MISTER NUTT? WELL, THIS IS A SURPRISE, said Death, reaching into his robe. LET ME SEE WHAT I HAVE HERE.." He goes on to say that Mr. Nutt will have an interesting life. [[User:TC01|TC01]] 01:38, 28 October 2009 (UTC)

::Someone wants to correct the recent edit to [[Death]]. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 22:51, 28 October 2009 (UTC)

== May I ask something? ==

I am a rabid Pratchett fan, have read all the books so many times that I'm on my second copy of most of them, etc, etc. you probably hear this a lot in any case. Is there any way to get in touch with one of the mods/site administrators? [[User:Doctor Whiteface|Doctor Whiteface]] 21:57, 29 November 2009 (UTC)
:The Administrator is [[User:Sanity|Sanity]]. He gives his e-mail address at the top of the page. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 22:05, 29 November 2009 (UTC)
::Many thanks. [[User:Doctor Whiteface|Doctor Whiteface]] 23:11, 29 November 2009 (UTC)

== RE: Current revision as of 00:06, 30 November 2009 ==

you misunderstand - I have no sense of humor in the context of jokes, puns, et cetera, in real life. that is to say, I couldn't tell a good joke to save my life. Jokes that can get a round of roaring laughter from any other mouth fall flat when I say them. I in fact possess the approximate joke-telling ability of Mustrum Ridcully on a bad day. That doesn't mean that I can't appreciate Pratchett's humor, wit, and dead-on insights into the core of life around the world. [[User:Doctor Whiteface|Doctor Whiteface]] 00:44, 30 November 2009 (UTC)
:Then I suggest you misstated. You mean you have no talent as a comic. Perhaps even Pterry couldn't make it as a joculator. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:00, 30 November 2009 (UTC)
::point well taken. However, I stick by my previous statement. I have no sense of humor. That doesn't mean I can't appreciate it.

Oh, and as a different note, I have a slight change that could be made to the fandom page: I've created a Pratchett Fanon wikia at http://pterryfanon.wikia.com/wiki/Discworld_Fanon_Wiki in case anyone wants to add their fanon to it. I also direct them to the Lspace wiki main page for a decent Pratchett wiki instead of the half-assed Wikia version. Think you could add my fledgeling fanon Wikia to the Fandom page? [[User:Doctor Whiteface|Doctor Whiteface]] 01:23, 30 November 2009 (UTC)
:I'm pretty confused as to whether it's a fanfic collection or a wiki or what, but you could list it in "Fandom" yourself (maybe including a one-line explanation). --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:44, 30 November 2009 (UTC)

== Death caption ==

An easier way to do what? The caption was properly specified in the previous version. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 22:15, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
:...to caption something without creating the white spaces, or generally put text where you want it without a lot of experimental colons? --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 22:56, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

::are you wanting to caption something other then an image? --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 00:57, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
:Mostly it's to avoid the white borders ([[User:JaffaCakeLover|JaffaCakeLover]] was just suggesting a solution available only to Sanity but I wouldn't be able to judge that - there might be a down side). Some other idea might require placing a block of text to the right, just for interesting composition. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:23, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

:: Oh, hold on. I may be able to fix that depending on the theme's security. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 07:31, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

::: Nope, not something I can fix. The issue is with a CSS rule in the "/skins/lspace/main.css?207" file. The border rules need to be removed from div.thumb on line 443. Typically, you can override these rules via special pages within the wiki. However, the lspace skin doesn't respect these overrides. Therefore, Sanity would have to update the CSS file or update the skin to properly respect the overrides. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 07:53, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
:Bugger. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 03:51, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

::We'll see. I sent the info onto Sanity. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 16:15, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

::Looks like it's now fixed. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 01:19, 12 March 2010 (UTC)

And all the rest at the same time: nifty! --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:54, 12 March 2010 (UTC)

== Power Cables ==

OK, so there could be also be a Power Cable, Alberta, a Power Cable, New South Wales or even an Elektriese Kabel in the Transvaal... but they'd still only get one page.

I will delete the lesser of the two. --[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 20:04, 29 April 2010 (UTC)
:Why not add your second paragraph? --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 22:27, 29 April 2010 (UTC)

== careers ==

To be more specific, I spent seven years developing web applications based upon the ColdFusion language ( think PHP, .net or java but cooler ). Next month I'm moving over to become an Oracle DBA. All this at a Dow component company. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 03:08, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

== About TC01 ==

Well, from what I've read of AgProv's and IronHippo's biographies, I think I could agree that I'm the youngest of the sysops/admins mentioned- not sure about other contributors with usernames or unregistered, of course. The Tiffany Aching series are written for people younger than me, though.

I spell, or rather type, words like an American, which is almost certaintly because I am one. The only possible exception to that might be when I type out {{COM}}, but I usually don't because I let the <nowiki>{{COM}}</nowiki> template do it for me.

I suppose I'll also mention that I do most of my reading these days on an Amazon Kindle, which is not actually that different from reading a real book (other than the inability to open it up to a random page and start reading). There are a few Pratchett books which I have only on the Kindle- which makes it handy when searching them for some obscure red link on the book articles.

And that's all I'm saying for now... Other than the fact that I reply to people on their talk pages rather than their user pages, unlike some people. [[User:TC01|TC01]] 22:43, 15 July 2010 (UTC) [[User:TC01|TC01]] 22:51, 15 July 2010 (UTC)

== [[Photographer]] ==

You reverted my edit to that page, where I explained Pratchett's joke (his definition of ''photus'' is clearly derived from the true meaning of the acronym POTUS). Where do you think I should have put the annotation instead? [[User:WLior|WLior]] 07:21, 1 September 2010 (CEST)

== Warning - British travel termini are bad for your financial health ==
We should have warned you.

It seems to be a universal thing about travelling in Britain that the moment you step into the precincts of an airport, a railway station, or even a large coach interchange (Victoria Coach Station in London, or Chorlton Street in Manchester), the prices you pay for sundry items go through the roof. It's as if the very act of stepping in through the front door causes the prices of even the most trivial items to soar by 25-40% or more, where they can get away with it. You are entering a parellel universe or a time portal where, given the usual operation of inflation, the world around you may be that of 2010 but you are being given a chance to experience a very specific aspect of the future - ie, what you might expect to be paying for goods and services in 2030.

A small bottle of coke which might cost 90p outside in the real world suddenly becomes £1.35; a packet of cigarettes which you might expect to get for £5.35 suddenly costs £6.80 (this was at the tobacconists' concession in WH Smiths at Manchester Picadilly - let's name the guilty party here!)and coffee at Tarbucks or Necros adds another 70p to the cost of a cup, or more... and as for buying food...

The sensible answer is - ''if going on a long journey by public transport in Britain, buy it before getting on the train or coach and get it from outside the station.''

The seasoned traveller will know where to look within a block or two of the station complex, and a service industry exists to fill this void. For instance, there is a very good and very cheap cafe just opposite Norwich Station, which capitalises on the obscene prices charged within the rail station, by serving great food very cheaply. There are quite a few around Picadilly and Chorlton Street stations in Manchester. No doubt the London stations have their satellites - there's said to be a great cheap cafe just behind Euston station that makes a bomb through the novel and revolutionary act of selling good food cheaply.

Nobody knows why this should be in Britain.

Arriving in Berlin, we found a very cheap eatery and cafe within the precincts of Tegel airport. This was not unique. comparing the euro price to what Manchester airport expected us to pay for a cappucino and a cake - it was nearly half as expensive.

Oh, and duty-free at British airports is hardly worth the while, as so much profit margin is loaded on the items that you are efectively paying the store owners what you would in tax, anyway. But at German airports...

Methinks we are being riped off, but at least you have a copy of {{ISWM}}.

Enjoy!--[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 10:40, 11 October 2010 (CEST)

== A word please ==

You and AgProv were here before that <nowiki>{{</nowiki>[[template:welcome|welcome]]}} was created. So was BOZZ but he hadn't had yet any talkpage messages, his talkpage had yet to be created, so I thought I,d do something about that. If he already had talkpage messages, I would have not welcomed him. Please excuse me if I had a mistake. [[user:Myrtone|Myr]][[User talk:Myrtone|'''tone''']][[special:emailuser/Myrtone|@]] 00:12, 25 December 2010 (CET)

These things happen. Don't worry! I'm glad somebody's consistently doing the meeting-and-greeting, anyway. AgProv, writing as --[[Special:Contributions/86.179.84.80|86.179.84.80]] 22:52, 10 January 2011 (CET)
Did you forget to login? [[user:Myrtone|Myr]][[User talk:Myrtone|'''tone''']][[special:emailuser/Myrtone|@]] 00:18, 11 January 2011 (CET)
Alas, yes. A bit of computer bother means I'm having to continually delete the internet cache and cookies, (virus-slaying) including the one that preserves my logon info for this site... --[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 23:59, 13 January 2011 (CET)

== History ==

*''As far as I can recall, you were the first British member here, after a number of continental, American, Australian and Canadian contributors (Shadeofblue was here long before but never contributed anything). How do you suppose that came down? --Old Dickens 03:55, 11 April 2011 (CEST)''

Sounds like an accusation...Thinking back... I discovered the Wiki as part of a general exploration of the L-Space Web and I thought "I can do things here". My first two or three entries weren't strictly within the rules - I opened general articles on Douglas Adams and Michael Moorcock as authors who either influenced Pratchett or were spoofed by him in the first few books, only to be gently reminded this sort of thing really belonged under "Reading Suggestions". As I was very heavily influenced by mr Beobaart and Mr Kew in the Annotated Pratchett File, and was a bit frustrated they didn't seem to be in a position to accept updated entries. So my ideas as to all those sly nudges and digs and references in the books had to go somewhere! Then I discovered that 50% of the time, the entry to go with the annotation hadn't yet been written, so - ah well - roll your sleeves up and craft it...

I do wonder why so many contributors here are people to whom English is not a first language - although some of them, I suspect, speak it better than I do. Better than my French or Dutch/Afrikaans or German, I think! Perhaps it's that urge, fairly indefiniable but an urge nonetheless, to get past the necessary restrictions of reading a book in translation, and to get to grips with it in the original language? (I'm reliably told there have been at least four Dutch translators of Pratchett, for instance, who range from "excellent" to "appalling".) This is a big thing on the French VadeMecum site, although readers of Pratchett in French whose English is also good enough to tackle the originals do tend to speak well of their translator. And English humour, the quirkier the better, does seem to travel well... (look at the way Monty Python and its descendents are a cult thing in the USA)

As well as annotations, for me, there's also an urge to mention all those little leaps of logic that connect otherwise unrelated facts mentioned in different books - inferring that because Lady Sybil and Serafine von Überwald went to the same school {{T5E}}, and Lady Sybil's school, named in {{T!}} as [[Quirm College for Young Ladies|QAYL]], therefore Serafine must also have attended QAYL. (Which leads to ''speculation'' - as opposed to known fact - that Angua may also have attended QAYL.)

Getting the entries as accurate and as complete as possible gets to be a bug after a while...
--[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 10:18, 11 April 2011 (CEST)

:What accusation? The question was why there didn't seem to be any British input before you came along, Britain obviously being the home of the books and the most fan activity. (Daibhid C was also a faqmaintainer early on but we never got any of his considerable insight, either.)

:The amazing ability of a series so strongly based in British folklore, history and humor to sell in many foreign languages is another interesting topic, though. P.G. Wodehouse and Monty Python did manage to penetrate the U.S., but I don't think they required the background Pratchett does (and I'm not sure Wodehouse would play in Power Cable any more.) --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 16:32, 11 April 2011 (CEST)

Heh... should have said "sounds ''almost'' like an accusation... ("you are accused of being British with malice aforethought and lurking in a built-up area of the Internet after the hours of darkness, with intent to perpetuate a Wiki...")

I suspect, to build on a thought, that we English-fluent native Brits have it too easy, and do not appreciate the treasure we have in Pratchett. This only becomes beautifully clear to those who have learnt English the hard way as a second language, or who have to assemble the necessary mental tool-kit to approach the intricacies of British English language and custom. Who is it who said a prophet is never honoured in his own country?--[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 17:12, 11 April 2011 (CEST)

:Jesus of Nazareth, I believe, but Sir T.P. OBE doesn't seem to suffer that way. Possibly it's just that English people already had a number of fan activities and we foreigners were more excited to have access to one. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 18:35, 11 April 2011 (CEST)

Jesus seems to been right about himself though there... -Marmosetpower

== On Vandalism ==

I don't know if this is the right place to suggest it, but maybe you should close down the registration for a while, fix things and put all articles under protection. That spammer seems to be a bot/malware cause thing, seeing the multiple IP-Addresses.--[[User:LilMaibe|LilMaibe]] 19:34, 13 April 2011 (CEST)
:Mmm. I'm only a lieutenant, though, no keys to the missiles. Thanks for pitching in. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 00:13, 15 April 2011 (CEST)

It kept me busy for an hour before bedtime. I'm guessing that once O.D. recognised how deep it actually went, it took a few hours of his life that he's never going to get back.So maybe we need to ask Sanity how to install deeper protection? --[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 13:03, 14 April 2011 (CEST)
:About four hours, but then what else do I do of an evening? There wasn't even a ball game until too late. I know you've killed longer evenings writing stuff. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 00:13, 15 April 2011 (CEST)... Apr. 30, now, was a full day. Oy. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 06:20, 1 May 2011 (CEST)
:I sent him an email last night --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 20:22, 14 April 2011 (CEST)
::So did I. He's investigating, but I don't know what could be done apart from general protection and that's never been popular. You only need the roof fixed when it's raining. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 00:13, 15 April 2011 (CEST)
:::Not to be negative, but this rain could easily be washing away the foundation--[[User:LilMaibe|LilMaibe]] 19:09, 15 April 2011 (CEST)

Well done Dickens old man. You're fighting a valiant vanguard action! Good egg.--[[User:Knmatt|Knmatt]] 21:59, 30 April 2011 (CEST)
:Funny, I thought I replied to that before (saying I thought it was ''rearguard''), but it's not here. I was busy. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 02:19, 1 May 2011 (CEST)
::As you are leading the way in this fight against these A-holes, you're certainly in the van. I salute your endeavours!--[[User:Knmatt|Knmatt]] 11:07, 1 May 2011 (CEST)

Ref apparent new attack of bots - not what it seems. Hi. I went into the Special: New Pages list to look back through all recent changes that were highlighted in yellow - ie, unpatrolled by a sysops - and patrolled them all (twenty or so entries). Three of them appeared to be hangovers from the recent spamming problem that had been overlooked, although I discovered the perpetrating bots had all been blocked. So this is historic stuff - it's certainly not a resurgence of the old problem! --[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 02:49, 8 May 2011 (CEST)
:Not new, obviously;, I just wondered how they were missed, but there were likely to be some oversights out of hundreds. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 03:09, 8 May 2011 (CEST)

== Quotes ==

Yeah, I think [[User:XEverettBlaked|XEverettBlaked]], [[User:NLoreenPetersm|NLoreenPetersm]] and [[User:AOscarEricksonw|AOscarEricksonw]] are spambots. They all seem to be going on about dating (hard to tell with AOscar, seems to be using a different language) and all fail at using spaces.

Also, I've suggested using the idea of [[Discworld & Pratchett Wiki:Mended Drum#Quotes|using quotes]] at the start of articles. I'd appreciate it if you commented, because otherwise I'm not sure anyone will comment. – [[User:Harry Blue5|Harry Blue5]] ([[User talk:Harry Blue5|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Harry Blue5|contribs]]) 11:43, 19 August 2011 (CEST)

:taken care of until the next batch comes in. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 19:33, 19 August 2011 (CEST)

==Very belated reply to your question==
So you may remember you asked me a question five years ago, at which point I promptly forgot the wiki existed...

Anyway, while I may have an ability to remember odd Discworld facts (I'd hesitate to call myself an "expert"), one look at my name should tell you never to trust me on spelling 8-). A flick through ''Equal Rites'' and ''Moving Pictures'' confirms that everyone else has it right: ''Necrotelicomnicon'' it is, making the pun a bit subtler than I thought. [[User:Daibhid C|Daibhid C]] 00:32, 21 August 2011 (CEST)

:Er, I've just read the [[Necrotelicomnicon]] talk page, and learnt a) Terry spells it inconsistantly and b) I've already weighed in on this. I swear, when it comes to things ''other'' than trivia from the books I've a memory like ... one of them things you drain rice in... [[User:Daibhid C|Daibhid C]] 00:45, 21 August 2011 (CEST)

Long time no see, indeed. It seems to me you're considered an expert around AFP, which is a distinguished panel of judges (beside a few jerks, of course). Coincidentally, I mentioned you recently in discussion as one of the few British originals here and for not hanging around afterward. I think we established ''Necrotelicomnicon'' as the correct spelling, despite a typo or a bit of TP trying to confuse us again. Don't talk to me about memory loss: I'm a lot older than you.
--[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:50, 21 August 2011 (CEST)

== Game namespace ==

I've noticed there's a book and game namespace, but none of the games (e.g. ''[[Discworld Noir]]'') are actually in the Game namespace. Are the games supposed to be in that namespace and no one's gotten round to moving them, or is it that there needs to be more discussion about whether to use it? – [[User:Harry Blue5|Harry Blue5]] ([[User talk:Harry Blue5|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Harry Blue5|contribs]]) 02:03, 3 October 2011 (CEST)
:I'd never noticed there was such a namespace. There may not be enough games to justify it, but obviously it's an option. I guess discussion is what's needed. (You ask a lot: I was still mulling capitalisation of book titles.) --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 02:35, 3 October 2011 (CEST)

== Carrot ==

I'm confused by your comment on Carrot. Either he is a fully rounded character or he is a cliche. He could be a parody on a fighter or a dwarf or something. But if he is, what kind of parody is he? [[User:Marmosetpower|Marmosetpower]] 15:09, 18 December 2011 (CET)
:Several things, as usual: Superman, Dudley Do-Right and all the too-good-to-be-true cartoon heroes as well as the rustic lad with an old sword who turns out to be the 'once and future king'. These are typically stiff, two-dimensional characters, often played as a bit (or very) dim. TP melts them down into a very tall Dwarf who starts out over-zealous and ingenuous and develops into the clever and capable Captain who knows everybody and everything that's going on while maintaining the outward persona. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 15:55, 18 December 2011 (CET)

If he is a parody of so much, is he still a parody though? I can't help feeling that this 'once and future king' stuff is a backstory, rather than a characteristic. If he did show a characteristic it would be denial of his 'once and future King' status. Being a King is not a character trait in itself. [[User:Marmosetpower|Marmosetpower]] 16:23, 20 December 2011 (CET)

== Threshold of evidence ==

Although I never posted to ABP, I used to read it a bit. I know "speculation" is a scary thing, because while The Man himself tolerates and encourages fandom, fans who inadvertently post one of His nascent ideas might cause the waveform to collapse in an entirely different direction while pissing Him off a bit at the same time. I also see that random unsupported annotations of the type "hey, Granny's hat is just like the one my aunt gave me for my 10th birthday, my aunt is from England, that's gotta be an obvious reference" shouldn't be tolerated.

Nevertheless, where does this wiki draw the line in terms of thoughts and annotations? Do you want textual references and footnotes? I do see lots of ideas in some articles which are, well, reaching. How far can we or should we reach?

Understand that I am taking no position here. I just want to know the rules, which I will attempt to follow faithfully. [[User:Moishe Rosenbaum|Moishe Rosenbaum]] 19:41, 23 December 2011 (CET)
:Ah. Rules! Well, erm...I mean, uh, we don't actually seem to have any ''rules'', as such (except against spam; we're definitely down on spam, but it doesn't stop the spammers either). Now I thought of the wiki as an encyclopedia with a pretty relaxed attitude but no room for unsupported opinions, whether called "annotations" or not; most people seem to like annotations better than anything. It seems to me that there's a fair consensus against annotation, speculation or fantasy in the body of the articles. At the same time, though, I've tried a couple of times to stir up opposition to the most outrageous blather and self-gratification (see pages of discussion in the Mended Drum and elsewhere) but most of us seem to hate ''rules'' more. I don't know, can you suggest some?

:TP doesn't come into it of course. He won't be reading this as he avoids all other such sites; no one ever objected to speculation in discussion pages or user pages. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 00:13, 24 December 2011 (CET)

== The great spam flood of 2012 ==

Have you spoken with Sanity lately? He hardly ever responds to my emails. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 16:01, 8 February 2012 (CET)
:No, not since he put in the sign-up restriction after the last flood. I was wondering if I might suggest the site-specific test but I don't know if it's reasonable or possible. Have you any suggestions? --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 23:55, 8 February 2012 (CET)

:: There's nothing you or I can do without access to the server and code. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 19:27, 9 February 2012 (CET)

::: Sadly. But may I suggest that new accounts have to be enabled by mods/admins to make new pages/edits. I tihnk that should be possible.--[[User:LilMaibe|LilMaibe]] 20:07, 9 February 2012 (CET)

: Unfortunately, that's something that needs to be done by Sanity. Old Dickens and I don't have access to modify that. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 22:36, 9 February 2012 (CET)

:: Damn. I hope one of you reaches him soon. This is getting ridiculous.--[[User:LilMaibe|LilMaibe]] 02:47, 10 February 2012 (CET)

Someone's been upgrading stuff, did you get ahold of Sanity? --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 16:18, 13 February 2012 (CET)
:Yea, he updated the wiki, ConfirmEdit and Bad Behavior and is looking into QuestyCaptcha or similar. I see it didn't stop them today. The Java buttons are gone from the edit panel, too. (four tildes) [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 23:33, 13 February 2012 (CET) ...and the categories now come with bullets! [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 23:38, 13 February 2012 (CET)

::He's still got some style fixes to make. Like the checkbox labels.--[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 03:04, 14 February 2012 (CET)

::And today's attempts were different. It really looked more like a person. Some things were inconsistent. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 03:04, 14 February 2012 (CET)

:::I'm starting to get rather pissed at our absentee owner. --[[User:Fhh98|Fhh98]] 17:49, 28 February 2012 (CET)
:It's tiresome, especially if you're supposed to be working, I guess. I have no web access at work any more, so I'm no use weekdays. Sanity is suffering with Real Life too, unfortunately. Whaddya gonna do? I sent him a complaining email. [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:19, 29 February 2012 (CET)

:Folks, we just had an attack on the MainPage. Undid it, but someone still needs to ban that bloke. On a further note: As nice as it is to see Discworld related questions for verification...'What is the first name of Sam Vimes' is not really going to do the trick...[[User:LilMaibe|LilMaibe]] 07:56, 16 March 2012 (CET)
We noticed. Sanity managed to fix it quicker than he thought he could, but of course it wasn't like the average spammer who could be blocked. The question could probably be a little tougher, but the the thing is that it's a program written to circumvent arithmetic and character-recognition captchas, so it's confused by any other challenge to artificial intelligence. (The humanoids behind it don't even speak English, very often, but they're not looking anyway.) It seems to be working so far. [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 20:43, 16 March 2012 (CET)...Oh, you meant the other Turk: Fhh98 got that. What is it with Turks lately? [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 20:49, 16 March 2012 (CET)
::Also not every user has actually read Discworld novels. If the question is to hard then real users might be scared off. Besides any spammers now have to register manually which would be a pain. --[[User:Zdm|Zdm]] 04:56, 17 March 2012 (CET)
I'm not sure we want input from anyone who couldn't come up with, say, ''Commander'' Vimes's given name. "Every user" is free to read but I'd prefer some minimum qualification to edit. Anyway, yes, the point is to baffle the program. [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 05:33, 17 March 2012 (CET)
:What about in a case like [http://wiki.lspace.org/wiki/Talk:Reverse_Annotations#Cartoons.3F this], the person hasn't ever read discworld but offered some helpfull advice. Besides there are people out there who might only have read the Diggers books or Nation for example.

Perhaps what Sanity was thinking, and a good point, but it does ease the way for manual spammers and vandals. [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 14:50, 17 March 2012 (CET)
:Well it seems to be working.--[[User:Zdm|Zdm]] 05:50, 18 March 2012 (CET)

As of tonight there are six very suspicious new names in red, that look as if they've been created by spambots. None of posted yet. But bearing in mind that most genuine new members of the Wiki community are only too keen to get stuck in straight away doing legitimate things, and these new names have been up for hours with no movement, would we be justified in delivering pre-emptive blocks? [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 22:25, 29 June 2012 (CEST)
Just pre-emptively struck at a bunch of suspicious new usernames and blocked the lot. I'm working on intuition and experience - people with usernames consisting of random letters and numbers are not likely to be people at all but bots. [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 23:36, 29 June 2012 (CEST)

Or maybe even somebody called Vintagegown, which kind of suggests somebody's read this note and thought creatively. This could go one of two ways - maybe spamming a site for vintage clothing? Or she (?) might even be genuine, in which case - make a valid new entry and welcome! [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] 00:13, 30 June 2012 (CEST)
:I waver between waiting for them to do something and blocking for 3 days or so as "unacceptable username": feel-of-the-moment thing. Fhh98's note to the Mexican pharmaceutical people didn't work for long. I see. See also the clever-dick TeddyAv. [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:02, 30 June 2012 (CEST) (Oh yeah. The other thing is that I'm pretty sure they're not reading anything in their discussion pages.) [[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] 01:17, 30 June 2012 (CEST)

==(Here begins a new administration)==
You should be able to delete users now by going to the users page and selecting the Delete tab from the dropdown in the upper right. --[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] ([[User talk:Osiris|talk]]) 18:24, 5 November 2012 (PST)
:Kowabunga! --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 18:29, 5 November 2012 (PST)...but I can't: I don't see the dropdown either in the '''User''''s page or in the '''User list'''. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 18:48, 5 November 2012 (PST)
::Try Again. --[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] ([[User talk:Osiris|talk]]) 19:05, 5 November 2012 (PST)
:::Aha. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 14:40, 6 November 2012 (PST)

== Interesting event ==

WikiShaper334 - I can't fathom this one out either.... on the face of it a legitimate entry, which is why the user remains, for now, unmerged. But the entry itself is fairly banal and unoriginal; the sort of thing that can be quickly deduced from a skimming of the rest of the article. The thought has occured to me that this could be a new tactic from somebody behind the spambots, to establish a legitimate presence here that will enable them to launch new spam attacks through the opening. Or am I being paranoid? I did a bit of Googling and a''traffic shaper'' is apparently a person, or automated software, seeking to order traffic onto a website so as to manipulate data - one use is to bump preferred links up a search engine. "Link-shaping" or "link-blogging" specifically targets blogs and Wikis so as to insert links that push favoured sites up a search engine listing. And adding a number after the name.... could be coincidence. But how can we prove or rule this out for certain? [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] ([[User talk:AgProv|talk]]) 20:01, 3 February 2013 (GMT)
:Of course we can't, just now. It's hard to believe an SEO parasite keen enough to go through that, but also hard to believe the username. Either we'll delete him when he gets down to business or he'll fade away. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 20:31, 3 February 2013 (GMT)

00:14 GMT. Is it me, or have we had no spammers since 17:21 - nearly nine hours ago. I don't like it, sergeant. It's far too quiet. They're up to something out there...[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] ([[User talk:AgProv|talk]]) 00:16, 4 February 2013 (GMT)
:They will come in bunches, but then Osiris could be tinkering... --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 00:21, 4 February 2013 (GMT)
::(The next one arrived two hours later. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 02:07, 4 February 2013 (GMT))
:::I'm tinkering.... I put in a blacklist of words and phrases. For example, try to make an edit using that Justin guy's last name and you'll see it's not allowed. --[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] ([[User talk:Osiris|talk]]) 05:16, 4 February 2013 (GMT)
::::Is there a way to make it so that known users can use the blacklisted words/know what they are?--[[User:Zdm|Zdm]] ([[User talk:Zdm|talk]]) 06:01, 4 February 2013 (GMT)
:::::when you hit one it tells you what it was. It's based upon this example though. [http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Manual:$wgSpamRegex $wgSpamRegex]

==Re: Johnny Maxwell==
Oh, sorry. Should I get rid of it? [[User:Drakon467|Drakon467]] ([[User talk:Drakon467|talk]]) 16:57, 13 May 2013 (GMT)
:I did already. Twice, actually. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 21:33, 13 May 2013 (GMT)
I've replaced it with a less guesswork-dependant one. Is it okay this time? [[User:Drakon467|Drakon467]] ([[User talk:Drakon467|talk]]) 18:39, 2 July 2013 (GMT)

Thanks. Rest assured, Yo-less definitely did say it. Of course, this being a Terry Pratchett book, it lost under accusations of Satanism and how Yo-less's mother wouldn't approve. [[User:Drakon467|Drakon467]] ([[User talk:Drakon467|talk]]) 05:37, 3 July 2013 (GMT)

==Junk page==

Apologies if there is a better place for this, but this seems a bit out of place. [[Girls Dont Abide By The Rules]]. I did try blanking it, but alas I can't make it disappear. [[User:Aldibibable|Aldibibable]] ([[User talk:Aldibibable|talk]]) 22:53, 31 May 2013 (GMT)

== Create page permissions ==
There seems to be an issue with permissions regarding creating pages as I don't seem to have that option today. Yesterday I had the option but not today. Is there an issue with permissions? Is it just me being a newbie here or are there times when things work only when they feel like it? It seems quite sporadic and most peculiar. --{{User:CelticWanderer/autosig}} 22:48, 8 June 2013 (GMT)
:I've also had trouble with permissions for the last few days, as I mentioned in the [[Discworld & Pratchett Wiki:Mended Drum#I'm locked out!|Mended Drum]]. Have you tried going back and trying again? I've found that the error messages aren't necessarily final. Otherwise you'd have to ask the [[User talk:Osiris|man behind the curtain]]. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 23:28, 8 June 2013 (GMT)
::I noticed your comment the other day. Yes, I have tried several times but with no luck. When trying to create an additional user subpage I get the generic response: <pre>There is currently no text in this page. You can search for this page title in other pages, or search the related logs, but you do not have permission to create this page.</pre>
::Yesterday, it didn't say this. When trying to create a page in the main namespace there's no create page tab and I get the generic search response when there are no results: <pre>There were no results matching the query.</pre>
::A curious case that I hope is resolved soon. Out of curiosity what roles do the different admins serve on this site just so I know for future reference? --{{User:CelticWanderer/autosig}} 23:44, 8 June 2013 (GMT)
:[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] is the owner/operator, I'm the ''Editor Quia Nemo Vult'' (housekeeper?) and [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] has been the major content provider for many years. (Also, your sig really fills up the edit box!) --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 00:56, 9 June 2013 (GMT)
::Ok, thanks. I was curious as you are shown as the creator in the active user list. Regarding the signature, methinks that is a hint to change it. I actually still need to create another sig page for transclusion that should fix this but I still can't create new pages. If it doesn't work when the permissions are fixed I will change the signature if you prefer. --{{User:CelticWanderer/autosig}} 08:34, 9 June 2013 (GMT)
:::[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] changed the permissions for me so now everything seems to be working at the moment. Also, I have changed my signature, takes up less much space in the editor and made it less distracting. --{{User:CelticWanderer/sig}} 21:58, 9 June 2013 (GMT)

==Mass Deletions - a double-edged sword==
There's got to be a better way... I'm ashamed to say while I've deleted a thousand spam accounts, two legitimate users have been deleted in error too, in the last week. And in the last month three thousand spam accounts have been created and are yet to be dealt with. That error rate is just too high (I've left fulsome apologies where I hope they'll be seen. Wish I had their email addresses so I could apologise in person. are these stored anywhere?) While I've cleared out all the spam accounts beginning with "A" and a good few of the "B"'s - as well as routine demolition of new ones as they pop up - I'm now hideously aware that mistakes will inevitably happen and I do not want to make any more. So tonight I've just identified a few known legitimate users who still have to make an entry on their user pages and left temporary messages there, so they show up blue in the user list and are less likely to be deleted in error. but there has to be a better way around this. Otherwise I'd keep on zapping through the B's...
:It ain't that bad, really. [[User:Sharlee|Sharlee]] figured it out immediately; if [[User:Aldibibable|Aldibibable]] is also on Wikipedia he(?) is probably capable too. Generally, though, I'd rather prod [[User:Osiris|Osiris]] (after a decent interval to recover from his shock) to execute his script to remove all the dormant accounts at computer speed. A problem with your valiant efforts at doing it manually is that the rest of us (especially me) can't see what else has happened in "Recent changes", even at 500 lines. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 01:37, 22 June 2013 (GMT)

== List of Characters ==

Not done, just for the day. Can change back if need be, have saved original on my computer. [[User:Rictus|Rictus]]

==Finally...==
Enjoy! I'll try not to post too many jaw-dropping spoilers.[[User:AgProv|AgProv]] ([[User talk:AgProv|talk]]) 23:10, 14 November 2013 (GMT)

== User: Netterku, possible spammer ==

Please check out User:Netterku, as I suspect he may be a spammer who has got through the net. Inept, as it's in Indonesian, which I speak as fluently as Vimes speaks Dwarfish (in fact, Vimes is native fluent compared to me). But interesting, in that the spamming sems to be arranged differently and not to the old well-known pattern. If you agree, and the user has not responded to my yellow card warning, shall we block? [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] ([[User talk:AgProv|talk]]) 08:26, 25 November 2013 (GMT)
:No need for discussion: I did. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 22:41, 25 November 2013 (GMT)

== User:AgustinSnider‎; ==

[[User:AgustinSnider]]‎;Spambot? Noted this user made an account on 31st August but has only "introduced themself" now. The wording of the introduction is also horribly familiar, although the declared location checks out. But no actual spam, as yet? Shall I delete, or will you? [[User:AgProv|AgProv]] ([[User talk:AgProv|talk]]) 10:11, 6 December 2013 (GMT)
:Yes, I seemed to remember the "Agustin" and the mismatched name and poor spelling are depressingly familiar, but I don't see actual grounds for merging. Inquire, if you like, but it can wait for an actual offence. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 14:42, 6 December 2013 (GMT)
::offense committed. Goodbye! --[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] ([[User talk:Osiris|talk]]) 04:00, 9 December 2013 (GMT)
:::Good shot,sir! --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 01:39, 10 December 2013 (GMT)

== Mine's a Boy ==

Congratulations to you and your family. Mine's a boy and he's coming today! Don't expect to see me much for a while. --[[User:Osiris|Osiris]] ([[User talk:Osiris|talk]]) 12:14, 29 June 2014 (UTC)
:Good on ya, mate (or more so the wife)! No, you'll be busy for a few years as I recall. I hope we can raise you in an emergency. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 13:53, 29 June 2014 (UTC)

== BS, regarding your userpage post... ==
Old Dickens, thanks for the Independence Day wishes from this American. I'm hoping that recent developments in GB remind American rationalists not to take anything for granted re the man with Orange Hair.

On that note, a few days ago Rhianna Pratchett retweeted someone's suggestion to her that henceforth, in honor of Terry, Boris Johnson shall be known as "Bloody Stupid" Johnson. -- [[User:Moishe Rosenbaum|Moishe Rosenbaum]] ([[User talk:Moishe Rosenbaum|talk]]) 22:54, 4 July 2016 (UTC)
:Hee Hee. I should have thought of that one myself. Good luck in November; we're at least as interested as the Mexicans here in the Great White North. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 00:43, 5 July 2016 (UTC)

== Reply from new user Wonderful Fanny ==
Thank you, Old Dickens. I will learn to avoid becoming historical. I do not see how to remove a page, but Ramkin House may be deleted. Before adding the page, I did look for Ramkin House under the Locations page listed in the Navigation bar to the left, but I didn't see it there. I now know that this is not the same page as your footer category link Locations, where Ramkin Residence is clearly listed, and which I found much easier to use. The two different locations pages are confusing. Anyway, I have added a few points to Ramkin Residence, as you suggested. I also edited the {{SN}} section on ACCOoDD, to clarify.

== Article on The Keep? ==
Hey, Old Dickens... hope you and Canada are doing well. I just reread (okay, re-listened-to) Monstrous Regiment, and I don’t see an article on The Keep in here. I’m ready to write something up, but first I want to be sure I’m not missing the article under a different title; and also to ask your opinion on what the title of that article should be. “The Keep”? “The Borogravian Keep”? “Keep”? Thanks! [[User:Moishe Rosenbaum|Moishe Rosenbaum]] ([[User talk:Moishe Rosenbaum|talk]]) 13:24, 30 July 2018 (UTC)
:I see no article or even link to the Keep. An officer refers to it at one point as "Kneck Keep", which sounds useful although a redirect or two would be wanted in any case. A problem with audio books is bookmarking or searching or generally finding anything in particular. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 18:30, 30 July 2018 (UTC)

== Hello! ==

Hello. I'm here for anti-vandalism work. Do you have the ability to make me an admin here? I'm pretty sure that you have bureaucrat privelleges. My main goal around here is to ensure that this wiki is what it should be, a user-made encyclopedia, and not a playground for vandals. --'''[[User:DCool1|DCool1]]''' ([[User talk:DCool1|Talk to me!]]) 15:18, 22 July 2019 (UTC)

== Novelpedia ==
Hello, Old Dickens! I am starting a new wiki project called Novelpedia. Novelpedia will become the largest encyclopedia in the world because there are more books in the world than of all Wikipedia articles. There are actually over 129,864,880 books, that means 129,864,880 articles. http://editthis.info/novelpedia. There will also be [[Terry Pratchett]] novels too. --'''[[User:Yoshi|Yoshi]]''' ([[User talk:Yoshi|Talk to me!]]) 10:39, 21 November 2019 (UTC)
:Very ambitious, but still irrelevant here. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 16:01, 21 November 2019 (UTC)

== Help! ==

I want to die. I have had too much for 20 years and I have had enough. It is my time to go. --'''[[User:Yoshi|Yoshi]]''' ([[User talk:Yoshi|Talk to me!]]) 14:31, 26 November 2019 (UTC)

== Morporxit? ==

Terry would have Something to Say about current events, no doubt. But in his putative novel, one could rest assured that the Patrician would be hiding somewhere, and the reader knew he’d make BS Johnson look stupid while he calmly took power back. I don’t see Vetinari or anyone rescuing Britain. Or America, for that matter. :-( [[User:Moishe Rosenbaum|Moishe Rosenbaum]] ([[User talk:Moishe Rosenbaum|talk]]) 21:59, 1 February 2020 (UTC)
:No, I don't see any Vetinari there either. Stephen Fry, of course, should be in charge, but he's not even trying1, it seems. Probably they'll have to rely on their older skill: muddling through. --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 02:24, 2 February 2020 (UTC)
:1 ''Well, he can be very trying; another problem in politics.'' --[[User:Old Dickens|Old Dickens]] ([[User talk:Old Dickens|talk]]) 03:22, 2 February 2020 (UTC)

:The situation also calls for comment from our UK correspondent [[User:AgProv|AgProv]], but he hasn't been heard from for seven months: not dead, I see, but {{Death|gone}}

== Category pages to delete ==

Thanks for cleaning up those two categories. You may also want to delete the (currently 5) ones on [[Special:UnusedCategories]]. [[User:JesseW|JesseW]] ([[User talk:JesseW|talk]]) 03:28, 1 March 2020 (UTC)

Span of a person's life

2020-03-01T03:25:32Z

JesseW: add mention of GNUTerryPratchett

On the Discworld the span of a person's life is not measured by how long they lived, but by their actions. It is said that a person is not truly dead until the things they set in motion while alive have stopped, and the effects of their actions are over. When the clock that they wound up winds down, when the crops they planted are harvested, then a person is dead.

[[Windle Poons]]' life span did not end until the next full moon after his death, when [[Lupine]] and [[Ludmilla Cake|Ludmilla]], who he had brought together both became were-people.

The cooling helmet that [[Cuddy]] had made for [[Detritus]] is still used by the troll to think clearly years after his death.

Despite having been killed and buried in five graves, [["Stoneface" Vimes|Suffer-Not-Injustice-Vimes]]' memory and legacy lived on, so that even three hundred years later, [[Nobby|people]] were wary about trying to become king of Ankh, recalling the part axes played in the death of the last one.

It is also said that 'while a man's name is still spoken he is not dead'. On Roundworld people still know and speak of Julius Caesar, William Shakespeare and Winston Churchill, decades or even centuries after their death. The [[Clacks]] operators have taken this one step further with the policy of 'sending home' and putting the name of dead clacks men on the overhead, with orders to turn around and resend when it reaches the end of the line, so the name will travel forever on the clacks lines.

There are [http://gnuterrypratchett.com/ various] [https://wiki.openstreetmap.org/wiki/Key:clacks_overhead efforts] (of which this wiki is one), to do the same for PTerry.

[[Category: Discworld concepts]].

Samuel Vimes

2020-03-01T03:23:18Z

JesseW: fix up link

Vimes Family Motto: ''PROTEGO ET SERVIO''

''I protect and serve''
{{Character Data
|title= Vimes
|photo= Vimes_Duck_Blanket.jpg | Sam Vimes by [http://tealin.dreamwidth.org/194944.html Tealin]
|name= Sir Samuel Vimes, Duke of [[Ankh (city)|Ankh]]
|age= b. 1941? UC
|race= [[Humans|Human]]
|occupation= Commander of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch|City Watch]] (Badge No.177)
|appearance= Skinny, balding and unshaven
|residence= Ramkin Residence, [[Scoone Avenue]], [[Ankh (city)|Ankh]]
|death=
|parents= [[Thomas Vimes]] (father) [[Mrs. Vimes]] (mother)
|relatives= [[Gwilliam Vimes]] (paternal grandfather) [[Grandma Clamp]] (maternal grandmother). [["Old Stoneface" Vimes]] (AKA "Suffer Not Injustice" Vimes)
|children= [[Young Sam Vimes]]
|marital status= Married to Lady [[Sybil Ramkin]]. A previous girlfriend, alluded to in passing in {{T!}}, is [[Mavis Trouncer]].
|books= {{G!G!}} {{MAA}} {{FOC}} {{J}} {{T5E}} {{NW}} {{MR}} {{T!}} ''[[Book:Where's My Cow?|Where's My Cow?]] [[Book:Snuff|Snuff]] {{RS}} [[Discworld Noir]]''
|cameos= {{TT}} {{GP}} {{MM}} {{UA}} {{ISWM}}
}}

'''Samuel "Sam" Vimes''' is the Commander of the [[Ankh-Morpork]] [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch|City Watch]]. He is the central character of the [[Watch Series]], in which his rises from being a poor and often-drunk policeman to being the leader of a modern police force.

During his first appearance in {{G!G!}}, he is the Captain of the (useless) Night Watch. He is promoted to being the Commander of a reunified City Watch at the end of its sequel {{MAA}}, and presides over the Watch's transformation into a modern police force. Through his detective work and adventures he saves the city and many people's lives on multiple occasions. He is often referred to as the second-most powerful man in the city after [[Havelock Vetinari|Lord Vetinari]]. As a result of his reputation, the word ''[[Sammies]]'' has become a nickname for watchmen trained in Ankh-Morpork.

Despite his distaste for nobility, he becomes a Duke and an ambassador. His current full title is ''His Grace, His Excellency, The Duke of [[Ankh (city)|Ankh]]; Commander Sir Samuel Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch''. He is married to [[Lady Sybil Ramkin]], the wealthiest woman in the city, and they have a son [[Young Sam Vimes|Samuel "Young Sam" Vimes II]].

== Biography ==
Samuel Vimes was born in [[Cockbill Street]], [[the Shades]], [[Ankh-Morpork]] into a poor family. Through his father Thomas, he is a descendant of [["Stoneface" Vimes|Suffer-Not-Injustice "Stoneface" Vimes]], who overthrow the [[Monarchy|monarchy]] in Ankh-Morpork centuries earlier, killed [[Lorenzo the Kind|its last king]], and ruled the city briefly before being overthrown himself. The Vimes family, until then a noble family, were disgraced and lived in poverty for many generations after. In his later life Sam is often compared to his ancestor, in both his personality and his appearance.

He went to the local school, where he was taught by Dame [[Slightly]] for 9 months and became blackboard monitor. After that, he spent some time in street gangs, including the [[Cockbill Street Roaring Lads]]. At the age of 16, he enlisted in the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch|Night Watch]], because his mate, Iffy Scurrick, had joined the year before and told him that there was "free food and a uniform and you could pick up the extra dollar here and there". Vimes joined the Night Watch shortly before the birth of the Glorious [[People's Republic of Treacle Mine Road]] during the [[Glorious Revolution|Glorious Revolution]]. In the original timeline, Vimes was mentored by Sergeant [[John Keel]]. Keel taught Vimes several important lessons, such stopping him from taking bribes at a time when such behaviour was widespread in the Watch. Keel took charge of the rebellion and was killed. In {{NW}}, the timeline was altered and his future self ended up impersonating John Keel for the duration of the Revolution, teaching him the same lessons instead.

Little is known about what happens between then and {{G!G!}}. Vimes became more street-smart, particularly after learning to fight with any means necessary by [[Gussie Two-Grins]]. However, the Watch declined in importance during this time, particularly after [[Havelock Vetinari|Lord Vetinari]] legalised the [[Thieves Guild]]. The Guild proved to be a better regulator of crime than the Watch. The Night Watch were reduced to patrolling the streets, ringing their bells at night and half-heartedly chasing criminals. During this time, Vimes became an {{wp|alcoholism|alcoholic}} (although as he was poor, he considered himself to be "a drunk", not an alcoholic).

By the start of {{G!G!}}, Vimes has become a Captain of a Night Watch that had dwindled to just four people: himself, Sergeant [[Fred Colon|Colon]], Corporal [[Nobby Nobbs|Nobbs]] and the new recruit [[Carrot Ironfoundersson]]. Around this time, Colon claims that Vimes never advanced further because he was "Brung Low by a Woman" (if so, then her name is [[Morporkia|Ankh Morporkia]]), although Vimes himself attributes it to his irreverent habit of speaking his mind to authority figures. But the events of this novel mark the turning point for the Watch and Vimes's career. The Watch showed their worth by stopping a [[Noble dragon|dragon]] from taking over the city. Vimes also began a romantic relationship with [[Lady Sybil Ramkin]], one of the wealthiest women in the city.

From then on, the Watch began to grow again. In {{MAA}}, Vimes and the Watch thwart another attempt to take over the city. As a reward, the Night Watch and Day Watch are merged into a unified City Watch and Vimes is promoted to the post of Commander, as well as being given the somewhat unwanted title of Knight. He also marries Sybil and kicks his drinking habit.

Vimes and the City Watch go on to save the city and multiple lives, including a plot by golems and a vampire in {{FOC}} and a threat of war with Klatch in {{J}}. For this, Vimes is awarded with yet another unwanted nobility title: Duke of Ankh. Later adventures include a journey to [[Überwald]] in {{T5E}}, a journey back to the days of the Glorious Revolution in {{NW}}, making peace between dwarfs and trolls in {{T!}} and busting a goblin slavery network in {{SN}}. His son [[Young Sam Vimes|Samuel "Young Sam" Vimes II]] was born at the end of {{NW}}.

===Ranks and titles===
Vimes's ranks and titles rise over the course of the series:
*Lance-Constable Samuel Vimes ({{NW}}, his younger self)
*Captain Samuel Vimes of the Night Watch ({{G!G!}} until the end of {{MAA}})
*Commander Sir Samuel Vimes of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]] (the end of {{MAA}} until the end of {{J}})
*His Grace, The Duke of [[Ankh (city)|Ankh]]; Commander Sir Samuel Vimes of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]] (the end of {{J}} until {{T5E}})
*His Grace, His Excellency, The Duke of [[Ankh (city)|Ankh]]; Commander Sir Samuel Vimes of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]] ({{T5E}} to present)
This is not the full list; he almost certainly had others during his early Watch career, and he had none prior to joining the Watch.

==Characteristics==
Sam Vimes is by nature an extremely cynical person. He has few good opinions on people in general, and even fewer on the nobility, the guilds, [[Vetinari]], [[vampires]], the city of [[Ankh-Morpork]], monarchy, democracy, [[Ankh-Morpork Times|newspapers]]...and the list goes on. In short, nearly everyone and everything is subject to his distrust. His first impression upon meeting someone is that they're guilty of some crime - 'the possibility that they were not guilty of anything he didn't think worthy of consideration' ([[Jingo]]) - though in a city such as Ankh-Morpork, this is more or less true.

Equally, he is known to be an angry person. His sheer, incandescent rage is barely suppressed by his desire to be lawful and administer justice properly (and also in a way, to not follow in Stoneface's steps). Due to his authority in {{MAA}}, when he finds himself in possession of the [[Gonne]], he struggles between his sense of justice and the Gonne's twisted desire to use him to kill in the name of justice. He can barely restrain himself from the Gonne's temptations. In {{T!}}, he nearly gives in entirely to those of the [[Summoning Dark]]. In the latter case, you have to consider that a [[Helmclever|dwarf]] stirs deliberately his anger, and the [[Dark Guards]] attempt later to assassinate not only Vimes, but also his wife and his fourteen-months-old son, using flamethrowers. On one side, there is Vimes, however rough and pessimistic he may seem, defender of law and order, and the other side is a Vimes who would kill for revenge and make his own law.

In {{T!}}, after years of nighttime patrols, Vimes's mindscape is described as the city of [[Ankh-Morpork]], streets and all, in the dead of night, with the rains bucketing down over your head. When Vimes is angry, doors of some of the houses (the more angry he is, the more doors) will open. When the [[Summoning Dark]] trespasses into his mind, needing a host in order to track down the [[Deep-Downers]], it tries to enter through one of the doors that opens when Vimes becomes angry, only to be pulled away at every time. It is later revealed that the force preventing the [[Summoning Dark]] from making any progress in possessing Vimes is Vimes's own 'inner guardsman'.

His chronic alcoholism may be partially due to his natural state of extreme sobriety, known as being [[knurd]]. According to Vimes's long-time close friend and fellow officer [[Fred Colon]], it is because that every other normal person is naturally slightly drunk to some extent to conceal the true horrors of reality from them. However Vimes lacks the ability to produce his 'own alcohol', as it were. Vimes used to attempt to cure this by drinking heavily; unfortunately he often over-dosed himself, and became an alcoholic. After marrying Lady [[Sybil Ramkin]], he quit drinking and smoked cigars instead. In {{FOC}}, he still has the habit to reach in stress situations for the bottom desk drawer, where his bottle used to be. But he'd never bought a bottle since he got married, and Carrot and Fred Colon keep an eye on him, as well. As of ''[[Book:Snuff|Snuff]]'', even his smoking has been barred from the house (likely for Young Sam's sake), and he sates his cravings with non-alcoholic mixers whipped up by [[Willikins]].

Another reason for Vimes's past alcoholism may be his history; Vimes has been on the Watch since his late teens. He has lived through the successive regimes of Homicidal Lord [[Winder]] and [[Mad Lord Snapcase]], two patricians whose sobriquets more than adequately describe their tenures, as well as several wars, and the legalization of the Guilds under Vetinari, which more or less broke his spirit. His participation as a young copper in handing people to the [[Cable Street Particulars|Unmentionables]] has surely left him also with a deep feeling of guilt and shame, after witnessing the results in their headquarters.

Vimes is a firm believer in the institution of law. He has a soft spot for the poor and those otherwise unable to fend for themselves, as although he views them as equally able to commit crimes as any other demographic; he sees law as a great equalizer, regardless of race (however despite his acceptance of just about any species into the Watch, until he was forced to in [[Thud!]] he refused to have a [[vampire]].)

As Vimes's long-time close friend [[Fred Colon|Sgt. Colon]] puts it, Vimes could get drunk in better style, Vimes could be baffled about a case with better vocabulary, and Vimes could deal with the paperwork. To himself, Samuel Vimes is a not very intelligent man with a sordid personal history that he'd rather forget. To many others he is, somehow, the person to look up to. [[Carrot Ironfoundersson|Captain Carrot]] quotes Vimes's ideas about social justice, and tries to make them a reality. [[Lady Sybil Ramkin]], Vimes's wife, thinks that he can sort out anything. The new policemen trained in the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]] and then hired elsewhere, though they haven't seen Vimes in person much, are called ''[[Sammies]]'' (perhaps a nod to the "bobbies," so-called because of Sir Robert Peel).

Vimes is far from being perfect, and he knows the fact better than anyone. In addition to former alcoholism, Vimes has many prejudices. He hates many kinds of people and many things, and he has quite good reasons to. He hates the upper class because they look down on the rest of the society while exploiting it (e.g. charging high rent from the poor people living in slum properties).

He hates [[dwarfs]] and [[trolls]], but he has stated that he doesn't care that much for humans either so he can't be blamed. He hates [[zombies]], [[werewolves]] and [[vampires]]; for unashamedly discriminative reasons, among them being that they cannot be killed if police duty necessitates that Vimes should fight them, and he believes that vampires naturally or reflexively prey upon people, as well as often being rich and snobby.

He hates dishonest policemen. He accepts that a publican may offer a free pint or a meal to an officer just because having an officer on the premises at rush hour makes things go more smoothly is just a way of doing business, but draws the line at an officer taking money to look the other way. He also sacks, and may even prosecute, officers who abuse prisoners or participate in crimes. In his view, the law must apply to everyone, or it applies to noone. That was why, in Jingo, he reluctantly agreed to arrest Lord Vetinari.

He hates [[Assassins' Guild|Assassins]] and [[Thieves' Guild|Thieves]] because their crimes are legalized and he cannot arrest them, and their leaders are even city dignitaries now. He hates [[Alchemists' Guild|Alchemists]] because they blow things up.

Just about the only kind of people that he doesn't hate are gargoyles, who never commit crimes that anybody finds out about, and the [[wizard's magic|wizards]]; they may mess up the space-time continuum and destroy the universe, but such offenses seldom fall within Vimes's jurisdiction. Vimes has a complicated love-hate relationshop with the city of [[Ankh-Morpork]], equating it to a woman who treats you badly, but you can't help but go back to her. It has been said that he protects the city just as he protects the dwarfs and trolls, so that he can go on hating them. In truth, Vimes has seen too many bad things in his line of work, and now finds it difficult to have a good opinion of anything in general; he is far too cynical (and yet depressingly sometimes not cynical enough). He doesn't have too much animosity for the Seamstresses Guild, since the Agony Aunts handle any excesses by customers, and the Houses themselves make sure that a customer will not end up beaten, naked, and penniless in the streets, "unless his tastes run that way."

In {{J}}, Vimes finds himself in a difficult and tense situation where he is holding the [[Klatch|Klatchian]] Prince [[Cadram]] at bowpoint, and is prepared to kill him because (tenuous) evidence links him to a conspiracy to kill Prince [[Khufurah]], but there is no court which would try the case. He is saved by the arrival of [[Vetinari]], who defuses the situation.

According to [[Detritus]], when Vimes found a child-killer who has kept a "''memento''" of his deed, it was all the troll could do to prevent him from killing the perpetrator. This all comes to light during the events of {{T!}} where Vimes' internal Watchman - which describes itself as existing to keep the darkness in rather than keeping it out- battles with the [[Mine sign|Summoning Dark]] for supremacy of his soul and is ultimately victorious in dispelling the evil entity from its attempts to use Vimes to kill for it. This can be illustrated by the fact that when asked 'quis custodies ipsos custodes' ('Who watches the watchmen?') Vimes's immediate reaction is 'Me'. When asked who guards him, he replies, 'I do that too.'

He is capable of accepting specific individuals. He has married Lady Sybil and certainly loves her. He accepts members of ethnic minorities in his Watch, has personally trained some of them, and is quite proud of them. He promotes Watch officers according to merit and ability, regardless of gender, species, or seniority. He also has a soft spot for the poor, the working class, or the young. When he finds younger Assassins failing their attempts on him, for example, he lets them go with only minor wounds; older Assassins, on the other hand, have been known to be [[Richard Liddleley|painted and tied up left in public]], or even [[Eustace Bassingly-Gore|chained up and sent on a sea voyage]] all the way to the other end of [[Klatch (continent)|Klatch]]. To put it very simply, he tries to look after those who have nobody else looking after them.

In attempting to carry out justice, Vimes has arrested sons of Ankh-Morpork nobles as well as city dignitaries, all the way up to [[Lord Vetinari]]. This has put Vimes high on the hit list of the Assassins at a price of $AM20,000 in {{FOC}} rising to $AM600,000 after 9 failed attempts at the time of {{T5E}}; recently, however, he has been taken off the register, and the Guild of Assassins no longer accepts contracts on his life. This may be because he is somehow vital to the running of the city, as [[Havelock Vetinari|Lord Vetinari]] is, or it may be because no sensible Assassin will volunteer for the task anyway. Vimes has personally designed and installed many traps and deadfalls all around the Ramkin family home and the Watch headquarters at [[Pseudopolis Yard]]. So far, Vimes hasn't been even injured by any Assassin. The Assassins Guild now has some of its trainees conduct "''dry run''" assassination attempts on Vimes as a matter of testing the trainee's skills - particularly if they feel the need to [[Jocasta Wiggs|bring the trainee's ego back down to the Disc]] (see {{NW}}).

He is also fiercely anti-authority, possibly a facet of his character which he inherited from Old Stoneface. That he manages this whilst actually being authority is, as [[Lord Vetinari]] put it, "''practically zen''." He regards being the Duke of Ankh as a job title and always prefers "Commander" or "sir" to any of his other titles, which include "''His Grace''," "''His Excellency''" and "''his blackboard-monitorship''" ({{T5E}} and {{T!}}). Continuing to call him by any of these titles after he's explained his preferences is an excellent way to get in His Grace His Excellency's bad graces.

Sam Vimes's full title of record is "''His Grace, His Excellency, the Duke of Ankh, Commander Sir Samuel Vimes''." His "Blackboard Monitor" epithet is used like a title in ''[[Book:Snuff|Snuff]]'', implying it may actually have been accorded some official weight by the Low King of the dwarfs. Ironically, the one title Vimes holds with genuine pride (as of ''[[Book:Snuff|Snuff]]''), aside from Commander, is "King" .. as in, "King of the River", an honorarium awarded in recognition of his role in saving the riverboat ''Wonderful Fanny'' from piracy and flood.

Members of the Watch earn the privilege, and it is a privilege, of calling him "''Mister Vimes''" only after very long association (i.e. [[Nobby Nobbs]] or [[Fred Colon]]), or after watching his back in a street fight to the extent that they have demonstrably saved his life ([[A.E. Pessimal]]). He does not tolerate the "''Mister''" from outsiders. [[Fred Colon]] sometimes calls him by his first name when he's worried. He has inherited his ancestor's nickname "''Old Stoneface''," but this is never said to his face.

==Activities and Duties==
As other noblemen might ride horses, wear laces, ruffles, and plumes, Sam Vimes walks the city on endless patrols and wears his old battered Watch armor and leather shirt and jerkin, with the standard sword and truncheon.

Since becoming the Commander of the Watch and as such a popular target with the clients of the [[Assassins' Guild]], Vimes also started the exercise of personally engineering pitfalls and death traps around his house and outside of his office at the police headquarters.

As Commander and top officer of the Watch, Vimes' job is to oversee its operations and has to deal with a lot of paperwork, a job which he hates but accomplishes adequately. He still tries to go on patrol whenever he has a chance; to him, walking the quiet streets in the dark is a calming, almost relaxing activity. When there is an important occasion on which crime is anticipated, for example, that a foreign dignitary may be attacked during a public appearance (in {{J}}), Vimes likes to personally check suspicious places such as an abandoned building that an assassin might use.

Deduction is not Vimes' favorite activity; he distrusts clues and loathes mysteries (''"mysteries get you killed"''), and he now has the [[Cable Street Particulars]] to deal with peculiar crimes, but sometimes Vimes still personally investigates a case. When he witnesses a crime occurring, he abandons everything and chases the miscreant. It is possible that he uses police work to escape the social life of "Sir Samuel Vimes, Duke of Ankh".

As both urged by Lady Sybil and ordered by Lord Vetinari, Vimes now often has to appear at dinners and parties. Most of the nobles and government officials that he sees at such social occasions, he considers stupid or obnoxious. Should he be accosted by one of these people, he does not hesitate to make clear how and why he loathes them. Vetinari likes to use Vimes as a diplomat, and while more often than not Vimes is the cause of diplomatic incidents, these seem often the intention of Vetinari.

The former Lord Ramkin, Lady Sybil's late father, had always had servants to shave him, to lay out his bath, to scrub his back, to lay out his clothes, to clean his shiny boots, and so on. Vimes now allows the butler to lay out his clothes, but that is about all. He insists on shaving himself as he dislikes other people putting a [[razor blade]], (or indeed any sort of sharp edge) to his throat, and attempts to wear cheap boots with cardboard soles. He has been walking the city in such boots for decades, and he likes being able to feel the different types of cobblestones so that he can tell which street he is on. Besides watch armour, Vimes has some gentleman's suits, a dress uniform of the Watch Commander, and a dress uniform of the Duke. He is often required to wear the ducal dress uniform, which has ruby tights (''"you wouldn't wear tights to battle if you thought you would be taken prisoner"''), a spiky coronet, a gilt armour (''"toy armour"''), and no place to hang his sword (''"you got made a duke for fighting and then they gave you no sword to fight with"''). Vimes compromises by wearing the Watch Commander dress uniform.

Nowadays, Vimes has to eat fancy food as cooked in the Ramkins' house. Personally, he prefers simple, greasy food with burnt crunchy bits, and so he is happier when he eats things that Lady Sybil has personally cooked by a dragon's fire.

Upon becoming a father, Vimes swore to faithfully get home by 6 p.m. every evening to read a certain picture book called ''[[Book:Where's My Cow?|Where's My Cow?]]'' to his son, Young Sam. This has become such a point of pride that he now has nightmares about not being home by 6 p.m. There is absolutely nothing that takes precedence over this; Vimes believes that if he misses it even once for a good reason, the next time he might miss it for a bad one, and eventually this attitude might spill over into the rest of his life. By the time of ''Snuff'', Young Sam has become the reader and Vimes Senior, the listener, but their 6 p.m. reading sessions continue like clockwork.

His son's welfare is one of the few things Vimes is willing to cross even his wife about, such that he insisted that they hire a nursemaid, Purity, to attend to Young Sam over Sybil's objections. Presumably this is also why the protective flame-baffles between the Vimes residence and Sybil's dragon stables are much, much sturdier in ''Thud!'' than in previous books.

==Annotation==
Philip Jackson from the British ''Robin of Sherwood'' TV series provides the voice for Vimes in the BBC Radio 4 adaptation of {{NW}}.

==Also See==
* [[wikipedia:Sam Vimes|Samuel Vimes's Entry]] on [[wikipedia:Wikipedia|Wikipedia]]
* [http://discworldreadingorder.azurewebsites.net/TheWatch The Watch reading order] - A guide to Sam Vimes's story arc.

:
[[Category:Discworld characters|Vimes, Samuel]]
[[Category:Leading characters|Vimes, Samuel]]
[[Category:Serial characters|Vimes, Samuel]]
[[Category:Human characters|Vimes, Samuel]]
[[Category:Watchmen|Vimes, Samuel]]

[[de:Samuel Mumm]]

"Old Stoneface" Vimes

2020-03-01T03:22:35Z

JesseW: Redirected page to "Stoneface" Vimes

#REDIRECT [["Stoneface" Vimes]]

Clacks tower

2020-03-01T03:21:12Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Clacks

#REDIRECT [[Clacks]]

Cranbury

2020-03-01T03:20:39Z

JesseW: add mention of it in RS

The town of Cranbury is a halt on the railway, on the Hubwards side of [[Sto Kerrig]]. Mrs [[Georgina Bradshaw]] notes that as a former staging-post on the coach road, it is geared up to the idea of servicing passengers in transit, and rose to the challenge of being a busy station at the junction of two rail lines. A local delicacy is pickled bottled cabbage which was formerly carted to many further destinations. Now industrialised and using tin cans manufactured in [[Swine Town]], Cranbury Cabbage is now available over a far greater area.

Do not try to go near [[Smirk Hall]]. this isn't a case of [[Don'tgonearthe Castle]]. They're not a pleasant family.

The preceding stop downline is [[High Mouldering]], and if you aren't going to [[Great Slack]], passengers change here for [[Sto Helit]].

It contains a [[clacks tower]] where [[Vimes]] sent word to [[Vetinari]] about the capture of [[grag]] spies on the railroad, in {{RS|, p. 287}}.

[[Category: Locations]]

Vimes

2020-03-01T03:19:11Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Samuel Vimes

#REDIRECT [[Samuel Vimes]]

Grag

2020-03-01T03:18:04Z

JesseW: add brief mention of inclusion in RS

'''Grag''' is a [[Dwarfs|Dwarfish]]-language title for certain quasi-religious figures. It has been translated ''renowned master of dwarfish lore''.

Dwarf tradition has it that the [[Tak|creator]] left when he was finished, so there is no religion, but there is the lore: the way things are done, and this is better respected than the religions of most of the godly. Grags learn and interpret these ancient instructions and create new ones, occasionally, for new surroundings. They are more the Town Records Office and Civil Court than the Church, but they command a great respect in their communities. Like priests, they may differ in interpretations and form different schools from the [[Deep-Downers|Deep-Down]] Conservatives to the new city-dwelling Reformers.

Grag [[Bashfull Bashfullsson]] is a young, modern Daylight Dwarf of Ankh-Morpork; [[Ardent]] is the spokesdwarf for a group of [[Knockermen|leather-plated 'Deep-Down' authoritarians]]. They clash after the murder of Grag [[Hamcrusher]] in {{T!}}, and further ramifications of the conflict play out during the later part of {{RS}}.

==Annotation==
In Judaism a grogger is a rattle like noise maker used on the Jewish holiday of Purim, on which the biblical book of Esther is read in its entirety and the congregation shakes the grogger to 'blot out' the name of Haman, the antagonist. Could Pterry know this?

[[Category:Discworld culture]]
[[de:Grags]]
{{stub}}

Done It Duncan

2020-03-01T03:12:07Z

JesseW: add mention of him in RS

Duncan Did It. He ''Does'' every major crime in [[Ankh-Morpork]]. According to him, anyway. A totally useless thief with not even the brains of a pigeon. Even tries it on with a [[Seamstresses|Seamstress]] idly swinging a handbag in the [[The Shades|Shades]]. This turns out to be [[Nobby]] Nobbs as a decoy while the more morphologically gifted Sergeant [[Angua]] lurks in an alley.

When he was younger he even stole the fire from the [[Gods|gods]]. Hmmmmmmmm. So, not [["Fingers" Mazda]] then? No, no - it was Duncan what Done It.

[[Carrot]] calls him the worst thief in Ankh-Morpork. As in, least good. Not most prolific, no matter what Duncan's protestations are. Often Does It so he can have a spell in the cells, where at least he's fed.

Only the second creature ever to have had Nobby feel sorry for, after the goat in {{FOC}}. He gives Duncan some small coins in order to feed himself. Angua can't believe it either, but Nobby backs up his image with a "Werl, I can always get it back from the Petty Cash..."

It seems that, in his eagerness to ''Do'' every major crime, Duncan has his ear to the rather greasy ground of the city's criminal underworld. This at least gets him a passing mention as an informant during {{J}}.

Nobby remembers him well enough to mention him in passing in {{RS| (p. 284)}}.

[[Category: Discworld characters]]
[[de:Schuldiger Schuft]]

Goblins

2020-03-01T03:10:12Z

JesseW:

'''Goblins''' are a small humanoid species on [[The Disc]]. They were generally despised by most other species until the events of {{SN}}, where they made their debut appearance and their culture was fleshed out. Historically, goblins have been treated as vermin, not humanoids, with no rights under the law; they could be enslaved or exterminated, with no consequences.

==Culture & Religion==
Goblins, like some [[Dwarfs]], typically live underground in large cave systems. Some live in the caverns on the Ramkin country estate, [[Crundells]]. Goblins have good night vision, living underground. Their language is very difficult for non-goblins to understand, and when they speak the common tongue, it sounds mechanical, as if they are opening and closing a box for each syllable. They wear clothing, make jewelry, create tiny beautiful ceramic boxes, harvest wild plants, drink alcohol, and sometimes -- people say -- they steal chickens.

In {{SN}}, goblins and their culture/religion are explored in greater depth. Their religion, [[Unggue]], is based around the belief that everything that was once part of your body is always part of your body, and thus, it must be buried with you after death.

{{RS}} reveals that, to goblins, a shortened name is a mark of shame and dishonor, with [[Of the Twilight the Darkness]] allowing [[Moist von Lipwig]] to get away with calling him 'Twilight' just the once as he understands that Moist was unaware of this aspect of goblin culture. The only known exception to this rule is [[Stinky]], the first goblin member of a local watch, as his superior and colleague, Constable [[Feeney Upshot]], needed something short he could use to call for help in the event of an immediate threat.

==Work History==
Because of their non-humanoid status, finding decent employment was difficult, historically. In a discussion about [[Dwarfs]] keeping up old traditions, it is said that rich Dwarfs in non-Dwarfish professions, such as the clerical trade, will employ goblins to do nothing but hit small ceremonial anvils with small ceremonial hammers all day, purely to create the sort of atmosphere in which a Dwarf finds it easy to think. Due to their former non-status, goblins were used as slave labour on plantations by unsavoury characters such as [[Gravid Rust]].

Goblins are also mentioned in {{RM}}, in an excerpt from a Merchant's guild publication, as running delicatessens in [[The Shades]].
In [[Ankh-Morpork]] they primarily work for fair-minded [[Harry King]] in his recycling and waste industries.

==Aptitudes & Recent Status==
As a species, their unique talents and abilities finally came to the public eye in the events of {{SN}}. Thereafter, goblins gained humanoid status. They now find work where their natural understanding of machinery comes in handy, such as on the [[clacks]] system or [[Moist von Lipwig]]'s new railway engines. From {{RS}}: "Goblins, quite apart from now being ubiquitous in the clacks industry, were also doing very well and picking up serious folding money in the ceramics business. Goblin pots were beautiful, extremely fine and as iridescent as a butterfly’s wing." In {{RS}} goblins manufacture the finest surgical instruments in the basement of the [[Lady Sybil Free Hospital]]. One can only assume they tinker away at the design, based on sketches from [[Dr. Lawn]].

Some goblins are incredibly talented musicians, with the young harpist and composer [[Tears of the Mushroom]] being a prominent example. Some goblins communicate with animals, as when [[Stinky]] soothed the horse Commander Vimes rode, in {{SN}}, and told it to kneel.

In Raising Steam, a goblin named [[Of the Twilight the Darkness]] shows great aptitude for steam engines, including the [[Iron Girder]]. Many other goblins get jobs working with trains.including goblins from Uberward. Of the Twilight the Darkness says, “Already Uberwald goblins giving themselves railway name. Speaks funny, those ones, but quick clever, like all goblin.” Apparently, goblins are natural-born tinkerers. One invented the bicycle in {{RS}}; Vetinari finally did smile and said, “A remarkable velocipede, Mister Of the Wheel the Spoke. I do believe that Leonard of Quirm had a similar idea, but now we are in a world of motion, I see no problem here."

==Relation to other species==
[[Gnolls]], in earlier books, are explicitly described as a sort of stone-goblin. (Use of the word "goblin" supports the position that originally, Terry Pratchett intended them to be the Discworld analogue of Tolkien's [[wikipedia:Orcs|Orcs]], as they are vicious, sadistic, murderous, and attracted to filth). However, by the time of {{J}}, all that appears to survive of this original concept is the attraction to filth and possibly a little residual cruelty.

In {{UA}}, a [[Nutt|new race]], initially confused with goblins, is introduced to the Discworld. This association is refuted at the end of the book, where Lord [[Vetinari]] remarks that [[Orcs]] must have been bred from [[Humans|men]] - only humanity has the inherent cruelty requisite for being subverted into orcishness; goblins are too small-time. TP ''really'' doesn't have that much respect for humankind. Goblins are, in fact, a separate species, unrelated to Orcs, Gnolls, [[Gnomes]] or [[Pictsies]].

==Notable Goblins==
*[[Of the Lathe the Swarf]]
*[[Of The Wheel the Spoke]]
*[[Of the Wind Regretfully Blown]] ("Billy Slick")
*[[Shine of the Rainbow]]
*[[Sound of the Rain on Hard Ground]]
*[[Stinky]]
*[[Tears of the Mushroom]]
*[[The Cold Bone Wakes]]
*[[Of the Twilight the Darkness]]
*By adoption
**[[Felicity Beedle]] ([[Carrot Ironfoundersson|technically]])
**Breaking Wind ([[Nobby Nobbs]])

==Annotation==
On the change of the nature of Gnolls through the books: there is a famous critical comment on Terry Pratchett's work, comparing him to Tolkien, but with the caveat that "in these Détènte-driven days, Pratchett has no horrors waiting to emerge from the East". (He doesn't have an East as such, in fact).

It could just be that an Orc-analogue simply wasn't needed - look at the way Elves have filled the niche for a non-human Other, which is inimical to mankind - and having introduced Gnolls in an earlier book, they simply got recycled to fill a different socio-ecological niche more suited to Discworld. Which as an argument holds really well together until you get to {{UA}} and have to rip it all up and start again, when a [[Orcs|new race]], which might originally have begun as Goblins (or men - see the article) but was seriously improved on by [[Igor]]s working for the Dark Side, is introduced.

[[Ponder Stibbons]] once played the role of Third Goblin in a school play.

[[Category:Discworld humanoid species]]
[[Category:Goblins| ]]
[[de:Goblins]]

Shine of the Rainbow

2020-03-01T03:09:51Z

JesseW: Created page with "'''Shine of the Rainbow''' is a goblin, in a relationship with Nobby Nobbs (as discussed in {{SN}} and mentioned in {{RS|, p. 284}}). Category:Goblins"

'''Shine of the Rainbow''' is a [[goblin]], in a relationship with [[Nobby Nobbs]] (as discussed in {{SN}} and mentioned in {{RS|, p. 284}}).
[[Category:Goblins]]

Reg Shoe

2020-03-01T03:03:45Z

JesseW: add mention of Reg in RS

{{Character Data
|title= Reg Shoe
|photo= Blank.jpg|
|name= Reginald Shoe
|age=
|race= [[Zombies|Zombie]]

|occupation= [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch|Watchman]]
|appearance= Graygreenish skin, occasionally bits of him fall off

|residence= [[Ankh-Morpork]]

|death= Some 30 years ago in the [[Glorious Revolution]]
|parents=
|relatives=
|children=
|marital status= single

|books= {{RM}}, most [[:Category:Watch Series|Watch books]]
|cameos= {{MR}}
}}
''For the God of club musicians see [[Reg]]''

'''Reg Shoe''' is the first [[zombies|zombie]] member of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]]. Originally a dead rights activist (founder of the [[Fresh Start Club]]), Reg Shoe has been organizing meetings, trying to rouse the dead from their graves, and complaining about the Watch treating undead citizens unfairly. When once (in {{J}}) he complained to Captain [[Carrot Ironfoundersson]], Reg Shoe was offered a position in the Watch so that he might give insights on how matters can be better handled. He then quickly became the main source of complaints made to the Watch by undead citizens. On the whole, however, Reg is considered by [[Samuel Vimes|Commander Vimes]] to be a good Watchman.

As we know from contemplating [[Windle Poons]] in {{RM}}, a zombie, almost by definition, has to pay conscious attention to all the little things, like ''systolic - diastolic'', and ensuring they all fit together in the correct order and sequence. This makes Reg an excellent detective and a good officer to have at the scene of a crime.

For him, there is no worry of death and little of injury; he can always sew himself back together, providing the pieces can be located. In one instance, confronted by [[Visit-The-Infidel-With-Explanatory-Pamphlets|Visit]], to consider the state of his immortal soul, he replies: "It's the state of my immortal body that's worrying me."

For a while, before an [[Igor]] was recruited into the Watch, Reg may have served as the Watch emergency surgeon. This probably reduced the amount of (reported) injuries, since the sight of a zombie licking the thread before starting to sew you up would be quite unnerving...

Reg Shoe died during the events of [[Night Watch]]. As much of an idealist and wannabe revolutionary in life as he is in death, he was repeatedly struck by crossbow bolts while defending his home streets around [[Whalebone Lane]] against [[Carcer]] and his men during the [[Glorious Revolution]] in Ankh-Morpork. This was only a temporary setback, however, as his revolutionary zeal caused him to ignore his injuries and continue fighting. Shortly after succumbing to his wounds, he returned as a zombie. He maintains his own grave in the Small Gods' Cemetery, where he spends one day every year in solidarity with the other Heroes of the Revolution who fell alongside him.

[[Image:lil.jpg]]

He was the inspiration for the addition of "communication cords" on the railway, after he lost a finger in a railroad car window. ({{RS|, p. 282}})

==Annotation==

On revolutionaries and footwear:- one of the great leaders of the Mexican revolution was called '''''Zapata'''''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emiliano_Zapata] by his followers. ''Zapato'' is Spanish for "Shoe".

We get the English word ''sabotage'' from French civil disturbances and revolutions. The wooden clog worn by workers was called ''un sabot''. Such a sturdy piece of wood could be used, in extremis, to terminally clog up and block industrial machinery if jammed firmly into the gears. Hence ''sabotage'' - or vandalism with footwear harnessed to a revolutionary cause. Throwing a shoe is still seen as a rebellious act, especially in Middle Eastern countries.

''Reg'', played by John Cleese, was of course the self-proclaimed leader of the People's Front of Judea, the haplessly inept revolutionary group in ''Monty Python's Life of Brian'', who was far better at spouting jargon and quoting the revolutionary constitution than he was at taking any sort of action. (To those of us who attended British universities in the 1980's, this parellels far-left groups such as the Socialist Workers' Party and the Workers' Revolutionary Party, who could echo Reg and the PFJ right down to the letter.) Later in the film, Cleese portrays another character named Arthur, who attempts to name the titular Brian as a Messiah based upon worshipping his every move - including the brief founding of "The Order of the Shoe" based on Brian's accidental loss of one of his own sandals.

Another shoe-related revolutionary fact: Joseph Stalin's father and grandfather were both cobblers/shoemakers. So Stalin's patronymic might well have been ''Josef, son of the shoemaker''.

[[Category:Discworld characters|Shoe, Reg]]
[[Category:Supporting characters|Shoe, Reg]]
[[Category:Serial characters|Shoe, Reg]]
[[Category:Undead characters|Shoe, Reg]]
[[Category:Watchmen|Shoe, Reg]]
[[de:Reginald Schuh]]

Noble dragon

2020-03-01T02:03:19Z

JesseW: rephrase, add more links

'''Noble dragons''' ''(Draco nobilis)'' are intelligent, arrogant, powerful, and graceful and beautiful in a specialized sense. Noble dragons are huge and winged, can produce an extremely hot flame, and seem to defy normal physics in both their flying and their flaming. If they were flesh and blood, each noble dragon would weigh many tons, but the one noble dragon that appeared in [[Ankh-Morpork]] merely flaped her wings once to take off and glided for the rest of her flight. The noble dragon is not known to eat much in the way of energy-rich fuels, but its flame has been found to be far hotter than that of the most gluttonous [[swamp dragon]]s.

The fact is, the noble dragon is one of the [[Discworld (world)|Discworld]] species that has evolved to live on magic. Its body materializes by magic, flames by magic, and flies (or glides) by magic. Since the large amount of magic required for a noble dragon to exist in the (somewhat) more normal dimensions of Discworld are not widely or easily available, the noble dragons have gone into another dimension, becoming metaphorically squished up like rather huge and beautiful sardines. A noble dragon can be summoned from that dimension, by a person, or several people, performing a ritual according to ''[[The Summoning of Dragons]]'' written by the [[wizard's magic|wizard]] [[Tubal de Malachite]] many years ago. People performing this ritual have to imagine the dragon very intensely, and gather objects that might be magical. The noble dragon feeds on the magic, comes through the mind of one of those people, and afterwards may be able to read his or her mind. In practice, the materialized noble dragon comes to share some personality traits with chosen person.

Dragons can also be summoned in the presence of a very intense field of raw magic, like the ones in the [[Wyrmberg]] in {{TCOM}}. A very powerful imagination and concentration is also needed. Depending on the imagination of the person and the training, one can summon different quantities of dragons, but they can only keep on existing within range of the Wyrmberg (because of some kind of inverse square law). As the dragons fly away they start to dwindle.

[[de:Noble Drachen]]
[[Category:Dragons]]

Silkworm

2020-03-01T00:57:09Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Dark Clerk

#REDIRECT [[Dark Clerk]]

Columbine

2020-03-01T00:56:54Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Dark Clerk

#REDIRECT [[Dark Clerk]]

Dark Clerk

2020-03-01T00:56:26Z

JesseW: add a few more named Dark Clerks (and citations)

A '''Dark Clerk''' is one of a small, select and discreet group of [[Patrician's Palace|Palace]] employees. Nobody knows what exactly they do but everyone can make an educated guess. They stand apart from the general secretariat of civil servants under the direction of [[Rufus Drumknott]], such as the former government inspector [[A.E. Pessimal]], in that they don't just manage the ever-growing burden of paperwork which is the price of establishing a modern State. Indeed, these are suspected to be the sort of civil servants who take over where the paperwork runs out and no written record is kept, nor is it desirable to keep, of an executive-level decision.

Not all the Dark Clerks are recruited from graduates of the [[Assassins' Guild]] school. Although these are the sort of civil servants who can be relied upon to discreetly ''execute'' a directive from above. Indeed, one example, Clerk Harold, who we meet in {{GP}}, is actually a [[Gargoyles|gargoyle]] and a very good listener. Especially when listening to a conversation in the waiting-room adjacent to [[Vetinari]]'s office. The golem, Mr [[Pump]], was another kind of Dark Clerk, used by Vetinari as a "probation officer". He was re-programmed with a very interestingly-written chem to suit his new duties.

It is thought, or commonly believed, that Dark Clerks are recruited into salaried positions at the Palace from Assassins' School graduates. As the usual well-heeled Guild graduate would pride the fact that he is nobody's employee and indeed is independently wealthy enough to scorn working for another save as a self-employed ''consultant'', those Guild graduates who are not so fortunate, the Scholarship, Bursary and Charity pupils, those who need the money, are the most likely candidates to work for the State. Indeed, regard [[Inigo Skimmer]], a typical Dark Clerk.

In [[Going Postal]] Lord Vetinari wished to re-open the [[Ankh-Morpork Post Office]], but the last three men he had appointed as Post Master had all died within weeks of each other in strange circumstances. Suspecting something was amiss, the next person he appointed was one of his own dark clerks [[Whobblebury|Mr Whobblebury]]. This proved unsuccessful, and he was forced to try a [[Moist von Lipwig|more radical approach to find a Post Master]].

And in {{SN}}, we learn Dark Clerks are routinely attached to Ankh-Morporkian embassies and legations overseas, where no doubt they perform tasks fully consistent with the accepted interpretation of the duties of a diplomat. Or ''some'' diplomats, anyway. The clerk [[Arachne]], on attachment to the embassy in [[Fourecks]], has been prevailed upon, at the end of {{SN}}, to perform a deniable service for Vetinari.

So the duties of a Dark Clerk might be defined as

* Security;
* Information gathering and analysis;
* Espionage;
* Occasional execution of strictly verbal directives from Higher Authority;
* Other sundry tasks such as legally constituted and accepted Higher Authority might devise.

===Known Dark Clerks===

*[[Arachne]] - Stationed at the Ankh-Morpork Embassy in [[Bugarup]]
*[[Condo]] - secret member of [[The Dark Sect]]
* Godfrey - assigned as bodyguard to the Low Monarch in {{RS|, p. 272}}
* Mavis - mentioned as having verified the quality of the safe house in [[Sto Lat]], in {{RS|, p. 273}}
* Columbine & Silkworm - mentioned as guarding the safe house in Sto Lat ({{RS|, p. 274}})
*[[Inigo Skimmer]] - sent to [[Überwald]] to assist and protect the [[Samuel Vimes|Duke of Ankh]]
* Ishmael - referenced in {{RS}} as the Dark Clerk assigned to monitor [[Charlie (The Truth)|Charlie]], lest he take it into his head to do anything creative or innovative.
* Mr Smith: assigned to work with [[Rufus Drumknott]] to help administrate really tricky legal issues to do with the railway, in {{RS}}
*[[Whobblebury]] - appointed Post Master to investigate the curse on the Post Office

[[Category: Discworld concepts]]

Mavis

2020-03-01T00:49:49Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Dark Clerk

#REDIRECT [[Dark Clerk]]

Ishmael

2020-03-01T00:49:04Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Dark Clerk

#REDIRECT [[Dark Clerk]]

Godfrey

2020-03-01T00:47:29Z

JesseW: Redirected page to Dark Clerk

#REDIRECT [[Dark Clerk]]

Tagwen Tagwensson

2020-03-01T00:20:54Z

JesseW: Created page with "'''Tagwen Tagwensson''' is a dwarf who acts as a body double for the Low King in Quirm, during {{RS|, p. 259}}. Apparently the song he was leading the other dwarfs in..."

'''Tagwen Tagwensson''' is a dwarf who acts as a body double for the [[Low King]] in [[Quirm]], during {{RS|, p. 259}}. Apparently the song he was leading the other dwarfs in is long enough to take multiple days to fully sing.

[[Category:Dwarf characters]]

Schmaltzberg

2020-03-01T00:06:04Z

JesseW: add more links

Located near [[Bonk]], the [[Schmaltzberg]] fat mines are an important source of fat for [[Uberwald]], as well as for the rest of the Disc. Presumably, they are the remnants of [[the Fifth Elephant (legend)|the Fifth Elephant]], one of the [[World Elephant|world-bearing elephants]] of [[Discworld (world)|Discworld]] who, sometime in the distant past, was knocked off the shell of [[A'tuin]] and went into orbit around the Disc, eventually colliding with it, seeding it with metals and flame broiling existing animals at the time, which over time became the fat deposits. The Schmaltzberg is also the name of the great underground city of the Dwarfs, accessed through guarded surface gates in [[Bonk]] and connected by a shared railway terminal.
It is discussed in greater detail in {{CDA}} as the underground more-than-half of the [[Bonk-Schmaltzberg]] conurbation.

==Annotation==
On [[Roundworld]], '''Schmaltz''' refers to kind of pork, chicken or goose fat often used as a bread spread in German and Polish cuisine.
"Schmaltzberg" literally means "Fat Mountain" in German.

[[Category:Discworld geography]]
[[de:Schmalzberg]]

Crossly

2020-03-01T00:02:22Z

JesseW: add mention of Crossly's part in the attempted removal of Moist in the middle of the night

'''Crossly''' is the ''major domo'' at the recently-acquired von Lipwig residence (or Dearheart residence; the point doesn't seem well-established) on [[Scoone Avenue]] as well as [[Moist von Lipwig|Moist's]] valet. '''Mrs Crossly''' is the cook and housekeeper. These, along with [[Crisp]], the gardener and handyman, seem to be a skeleton staff for a [[Scoone Avenue]] mansion, but the von Lipwig-Dearhearts are away on business a lot and [[Adora Belle Dearheart|Spike]] in particular won't be wanting to entertain the local gentry very much.

Crossly's most difficult task is getting the young master out of bed for important [[Havelock Vetinari|business]] at unholy hours of the morning (often with single digits). Managing the large house is less onerous for Mrs Crossly because it's so often vacant.

He approves of Moist's handling (with the aid of Spike and her dodgy crossbow) of the Patrician's guards' ignoring of propriety. ({{RS|, p. 250-252}})

[[Category:Discworld characters]]

Category:Discworld characters

2020-02-29T23:51:40Z

JesseW:

'''All the sentient inhabitants of Discworld of any species, including the odd [[Gaspode|dog]], [[Maurice|cat]] or [[You Bastard|camel]].'''
[[Category:Characters by book]]